What is a lie?

Depending upon the dictionary you use, when you look up the word “lie” and try to define it, you’ll find that it’s mostly referred to as some sort of deception, false impression, or intentionally untrue statement.

So, a lie then, is defined as the opposite of truth. Right? It’s something that’s untrue.
Or is it?
Is the lie the opposing viewpoint?
Is it a lie because it goes against what you KNOW, or perceive to be true?
Many years ago, I used to say that my ex could lie to me and tell me the sky was black, though I knew it was blue. And that he was so good at it, so convincing, he’d make me look at the sky again to be sure.
I used to get so angry (mad) when he, or anyone would lie to me! Grrr… what planet were they from? Why would they lie? To get what they wanted?
But now I wonder. What if a lie is really just another way of looking at something?
Let’s imagine we’re standing at a tree. A tree that is full of leaves.
The side of the tree you’re looking at has green leaves, so you make an assumption that all of the leaves of the tree are green. But, what if someone else is standing on the other side of the tree, and there are a few yellow or reddish colored leaves on that side.
Even if we care about the person standing over there, we might get defensive when our friend states they love the yellow leaves they’re seeing. We may disagree or argue our point, even without walking around to the other side!
So, how can we know for sure what colors the leaves are on the other side of the tree?
Like the yellow leaves on the other side of that tree, opposite from where you are standing, a lie is something someone else thinks they know.
They’ll defend “their truth” about yellow leaves until the cows come home!
But, you can’t see the yellow leaves, so you think they’re wrong, nuts, or crazy.
Instead, why not just allow the other person to have his or her understanding of it?
And what difference does any of it make anyway?
We don’t always have to be right after all? And if we do, then that’s our ego.
What if a lie is the other perspective that you are unable to understand?
Think about a conversation where someone says something that you believe is untrue. It makes you mad. You fight it. The anger about the lie becomes intense within you.
Where do you feel that anger?
How do you feel it?
Isn’t it bizarre that you can actually FEEL the weight, or density of the negative energy?

Ahh, there’s almost a substance to it.

Thus, emotion scribes energy to the cellophane (the invisible realm where energy is stored before/after it becomes matter).
What???
Now, I realize your head may have just exploded, but try to follow this:
Imagine that there’s a sheet of cellophane between you and the person you are having a heated conversation with.
When you allow their perception (their version of the truth) to upset you, you speak some charged words.
The energy from your words sticks in the cellophane.
The next time someone walks through that cellophane, especially a sensitive person (sensitive to energies), they FEEL that dense energy–almost like a heaviness in the air!
So, the next time someone lies to you, consider first, that they are only sharing their perspective with you. You may not agree. You may not like it.
When someone lies to you, especially if it’s about a really important subject, tell yourself that they are in a different reality. And FEEL if this lightens the weight of the lie.
Just as I no longer believe that a lie is wrong or bad, I also no longer believe there’s such a thing as false hope. For any hope at all, whether it is based on fact or fiction, is still hope.
Let’s assign truth and hope the number 1 and a lie and false hope the number 0.
1+0 = 1
Thus, we see that the even when we try to add something false to something true, we still have something true. It’s only our perception that is limited.
Remember that HOPE is the substance of things not yet seen. Not yet seen! Not real yet. Not actual yet.
So, let’s say someone tells you a lie about a topic that you don’t care much about. You can shrug it off easily, right?

However, when someone tells you a lie about love, about someone you love, or that they don’t love you, that lie drains you of energy, right?

Similar to a battery that only has enough power to keep it going, though not enough to start the engine, a lie about the existence of love pulls energy out of you.
Why?
Because WE are all LOVE in our core and anything that shuts down or restricts that love FEELS bad to us.
Perspectives. It’s all about perspectives and perception.
Check out these two images from the same kaleidoscope, that was simply turned a bit:
IMG_6905.jpgIMG_6934.jpg
How do each of these two statements make you feel?
I love that you make me laugh!
Versus
I love to laugh at you!
Pick up a kaleidoscope and peer into it, notice the myriad perspectives available to you. The fractals involved in the patterns created. And when, because you will, you cannot help to do so, move it the slightest bit the light will hit the items within it, and you’ll see different colors and patterns. For this is the way of the kaleidoscope. This is also the way of the interconnectedness of the universe.
I hope this helps to lighten you today, and step a bit lighter on the earth.

Be the person your Soul knows you are!

I love you.
You are enough.
You are worthy of love.
Namaste. OM
Note: This post is NOT about condoning lies or compulsive liars (certainly no one needs to stay with people who habitually act like that), it’s about feeling better, coming to terms, or forgiving someone when it occurs. Learn and move on. It’s all YOUR choice.
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My take on New Thought

First, the back drop I’d like to make is that one of the things humans love to do is to make much ado about nothing. We love to categorize, label, and define things, which often leads to us complicating very simple things. We also love to feel in CONTROL, by controlling situations, or people, around us.

I love to find the wisdom within the simple things. I love to look at everything from a child’s point of view. I feel this helps keep my thoughts and energy balanced.

Thus, the main points I’d like to capture here are as follows:

I’ve written previously that there are many names for God, whilst Omnipotence, Omniscience, Omnipresence is above and beyond and LIMITLESS of “naming.” To say that Omni-everything is a Deity (whether personal or impersonal) with any name, still sounds limiting to me.

Oneness works for the Omni-everything, but Divineness (to me) still implies some sort of inherent “goodness.” Omni-everything is ever-living, creating and destroying. If you can find the “goodness” in destruction, then perhaps we’re sharing the same stream of consciousness.

To strictly state that there is a “Law” of anything is something difficult for a child to understand. My six year old granddaughter knows when she touches something too hot, it can hurt her. Or if she drops something heavy on her toe, that it hurts. But she does not comprehend any kind of law, not even the law of gravity, much less the law of attraction. However, could there be any kind of laws, of course, though that concept seems man-made to me, so if you think Omni-everything dictates certain precepts or laws, you’re anthropomorphizing the LIMITLESS.

One may also suggest that LIMITLESS constructs the Universes according to certain laws. I’d rather suggest that LIMITLESS organizes Universes by design. Within art, there are no mistakes. Take whatever you think Perfection is, and find the imperfection. Find a way to love that.

Through the LIMITLESS Omni-everything, we are. We exist. We BE. Whether or not we’ve lived before, most surely we live NOW. And right now we are creating our reality through our thoughts, time, attention, intention, and way of BEing. For this, we are each responsible. We are choosing in every minute, by direct focus, or not.

Whether we realize the impact of our actions, which stem from each and every thought we have, effects others or not, We Are All Connected, so they do. We sew and reap. What we sew impacts others. And others sew impacts us. But always, there are ways for us to choose.

Some people choose not to live in a house divided, or in a county where too much control is exerted over them. They CHOOSE to leave. In this way, they are creating their own reality by choosing to make a better choice for them, in the NOW.

Even people in bondage can choose to control their thoughts and find freedom there. Those who do not feel they have any choice in their day to day, can meditate and find relief. No one can ever control  your thoughts. In your thoughts is where you can find total freedom.

A child would not know of, or necessarily be caught up in performing rituals or services, thus dogmas and religions wouldn’t be important. However, most children understand (by way of parental conditioning) that honoring their parents, or those that care for them, is important. I find a personal fulfillment in the honoring of my ancestors, if for no other reason than I would not be here in this life, physically, had it not been for them.

It matters not to me of which religion or dogma my ancestors believed, or practiced. I am still here. I am thinking it would be better somehow if I came to be here via the LOVE they expressed for one another, but I am mature enough to realize that is not the case for everyone. Some are born outside of, and apart from a loving experience, but that does not mean they cannot find love. And it certainly does not mean they are not worth of being loved.

Children understand that truth, love, and compassion FEELS freeing. It does not feel good to be called names (even in a joking way), and it does not feel good to be excluded or neglected.

Children do not get all that caught up in whether they’ve lived before, or whether someone leaves their experience, as long as their present moment is nurturing and fun–full of new and continuing opportunities for BEing part of something, anything!

 

 

Therefore, the use of exclusionary words, such as “only” cause divisiveness.

When you limit anyone about anything with words such as “only” you are using control, or attempting to guide them in one direction. The Omni-everything allows, (not control). Control is an illusion, and one that is best let go of, if one prefers to FEEL free.

In freedom and love,

OM

Me too. Until now.

“I want all of the girls watching here now to know, that a new day is on the horizon. And when that new day finally dawns, it will be because of a lot of magnificent women, many of whom are right here in this room tonight, and some pretty phenomenal men, fighting hard to make sure that they become the leaders who take us to the time when nobody ever has to say, ‘me too’ again.” Energetically stated by, Oprah Winfrey, when she accepted the 2018 Cecil B. DeMille award during the Golden Globe Awards 2018. #GoldenGlobes

https://www.facebook.com/GoldenGlobes/videos/1884721461569863/

You know, every time I watch Oprah’s Golden Globe 2018 Cecil B. DeMille’s lifetime achievement award acceptance speech, I become so emotional. I understand that it’s not just because of the words within the so well-crafted speech that connects Oprah (along with us) back to her childhood, or even her captivating and powerful delivery. Yes, her speech builds up to a certain momentum–that’s true. But, Oprah uses this time, so elegantly, to teach us a grand history lesson about Recy Taylor and Rosa Parks. And to emphasize why that lesson is so important.

While I understand that we may not always share the same word definitions, personally, yes, very personally and deep, Oprah’s speech resonates with me. Why? Because I have “been there.”

I have been in too many situations where I have been sexually harassed, intimidated, berated, held back from raises or promotions, mentally and physically abused, and more. And whether through ignorance, immaturity, or low self-esteem (low self worth), on some level, I allowed men (and even a few women) to belittle, bully, manipulate, or coerce me into doing things that—at least at the time—were not in my best interest and made me feel even worse about myself.

Yes, you may think that I am strong. And many times I had to be strong. But I am sensitive, more serious than joyful, and quiet. I studied, prayed, and doggedly pulled myself through it all, (believing always with God’s help—even when I found myself in the most brazen of situations) because I had children to raise. And while I learned, forgave, and mustered through, there were times I faltered. There were times I got angry and stood up for myself and my children. But those times were rare, because it seemed there was always someone else standing near to be critical of my stance, not knowing (how could they?) of all the prior bullshit I had endured.

Only because of where I am now can I say, “Everything resolves to gratitude.

Because now, I get the end game. I’ve glimpsed the Great Beyond that awaits us all, where all of the tiny entanglements between us, all of the reasons, and nearly inconceivable intentions will be revealed!

I understand We Are All Connected, and that we are on a mysterious, yet marvelous journey in this life. That every little thing matters. That love, faith, gratitude, and joy are our rewards, and that we can experience them NOW.

The gratitude I carry with me today having come through all the chaos, does not mean I think it’s okay for abuse or bullying to occur, nor do I think it’s okay for anyone to remain in an abusive relationship. However, I know not everyone in an abusive relationship knows HOW to ask for help, or HOW to get out. I know that they may feel trapped.

More to my point though, is that I believe in hope, even if it’s only a glimmer, or only a fractal.

Take one step forward, then another. Hope. Ask. Share. Trust. Move forward with faith that you can heal, and that you can be free.

As my wise sister-in-law has taught me, “never let anyone steal your joy.” And there is always something to be joyful about, even if it’s only breath!

Live while you’re alive! Do things with people who fascinate you! Dream big!

Focus.

Only you see life through your eyes. Only you can decide what’s right for you.

To those who do not like Oprah, or do not understand her speech, it’s probably because you have not been through hell, or not the kind she spoke about.

I would encourage you to refrain from judging her speech on snippets, pundits remarks, or whatever political motivations you might think she has, etc. because for some people (like me), her speech was so vindicating and liberating that we may never be the same!

I’ve been waiting a lifetime to hear it! And I am not alone. So, please, don’t steal our joy!

Thank you, Oprah!

Here’s to the many who will be empowered to say, “Me too. Until now.”

Be the person your Soul knows you are!

Namaste. OM

Careful — Your tone is showing

Every sound you utter is a certain tone. Yes, even when you grunt, groan, or hum—the sound you emit comes out as a specific tone. And tones transmit our intention. So, be careful dear ones, your tone of voice is showing what’s in your heart.

For years I’ve been curious about the “tone of someone’s voice” because I grew up in a house where arguing and yelling was the norm, and I hated it.

There’s no blame here, as it wasn’t only my parents arguing. When I would retort in defense of a scolding, mom would say, “don’t speak to me with that tone!”

It became commonplace for me to cover my ears whenever anyone would raise their voice. And I always wondered, “why”?

I have come to know that I’m upset by harsh tones of voice because I am a sensitive, or empath.

Understand that my physical ears could take it, but the experience of someone yelling or screaming in anger near me would shake my emotional world.

Moreover, I knew my ears weren’t the problem because I’d attended many rock concerts over the years, and hung out with family and friends at many “Bike Week” events (motorcycle engines roaring) and that didn’t bother me. At least it didn’t bother me for many years. But something about a person yelling near me, with their intention of anger would totally upset my apple cart.

I knew there was a difference between someone screaming for help and someone yelling out of anger. I could hear it in the tone of voice. So, for the sake of this post, I’m probing the intention of anger / hostility.

Books have been written about how hurtful words disrupts the body and spirit. I believe that’s got a lot more to do with the tone of the voice delivering those hurtful words, than the actual words themselves. Especially since we’re all empowered and have the ability not to accept into us, the meaning of any word. (See my previous article, “Words are only as powerful as we allow.“)

Conversely, tonal frequencies can be healing to the body as I explored in my Tibetan bowl article:

“…specific tones (or frequencies) that resonate deep into your body. The harmonics of the tones can help you experience a connection throughout your entire body. And when we feel “connected”, a sense of calm and relaxation can be achieved.”
I now have a conscious choice when anyone is angry within my vicinity–I can leave. I do not have to subject myself to ill intent. I am sure over the years I have left too, in particular I can cite a couple of marriages ending (not solely due to the arguing, but I wouldn’t tolerate in any longer).
I believe this tonal thing is also why I resonate so much with peaceful music, and calm public speakers. I will not attend any lecture or other type of event where an angry tone of voice is being projected at people. I FEEL it. And I love the cells of my body too much than to subject any of the 70 trillion of them to that kind of abuse.
I know that loving intention produces a calming and gentle power within one’s body, mind, and spirit and that’s where I choose to reside.
For those who say fighting, arguing, and so on is a normal part of marriage–I beg to differ. My third husband and I have never raised our voices in disagreement in over 14 years together. There is a way to communicate, even debate, without spuing painful words at oneself or another.

Backed by hard science?

To a degree. Brain waves have been measured by scientists for many years. And scientists say that while we’re awake our normal brain frequency is in something called, Beta. Certain sound tools, or modalities can train the brain to shift into deeper Alpha and Theta brain wave frequencies. These are the frequencies one experiences after deep contemplative, mindful, or other types of meditative practices. Science can measure brain waves and make a correlation between sound therapy and the body’s healing response. Thus, sound is a type of energy medicine and can help the body heal from pain, stress, and more.

The bones and organs in the body all possess a different resonant frequency that can be scientifically measured.

It’s not possible for you to desire something that would be detrimental to anyone, and feel good at the same time, because if you set forth an intention like that, you would deviate from the vibration of Source–the spirit of God within you–and you would feel the emptiness of it.
Ah, at its essence sound is only vibration. Sound is only interpreted vibration by the hearer…
In the womb I was made from everything my mom breathed, ate, drank, thought, and felt. I had no say about those things. I felt the resonance of the vibrations of her intentions and emotion. What were the intentions of my mother? Was she worried? Thankful? Apprehensive? Eagerly anticipating? Joyful?
Intention can set the stage for what’s going to be most predominant in a child’s life!
May the tone of your voice always convey the intent of your heart.
Be the person your Soul knows you are!
Thank you. Namaste. OM

Who Am I?

I AM my ancestors (who continue to live in my DNA and blood), and Everything I’ve experienced up to this point since the moment of my physical birth–and perhaps from Beyond it too!

My physical body consists of “star stuff”: dirt and water, the elements of the earth and stars. I breathe, because our Creator Source once breathed a soul essence into a human being. No human has ever created another living breathing life from nothing. We make babies from a male and a female human BE-ing. Our breath originated somewhere. WE human BE-ings can only share breath. Our essence came from some ONE. That is logic.

Let me present some definitions to you, as you may need some context around this article before you can really “get it.”

  • Ancestors – anyone who shares my DNA and/or blood. I see this as a line, past, present, and future. What I experience today (in the Now), ah yes, is driven, or built upon, the foundation that all my previous living relations have experienced. This line allows me to affect change in the lives of those I am currently related to, as well as who will come down in the future–my legacy).
  • Blood – the viscous liquid coursing through my veins. It is a well established fact, and proven by my mother, that when a mother and father’s blood is incompatible a baby cannot naturally come forth from them. Yes, of course today it is known that with medical intervention a baby can be saved–but at times, there are still complications from the blood mismatch).
  • DNA – The biological, scientific explanation of the genetic carrier of information (deoxyribonucleic acid) that exists inside of each of us–not seen by the naked eye–which allows each of us to self-replicate. This substance is claimed to exist in “nearly all living organisms as the main constituent of chromosomes.”
  • Aware / Awake person – One who has an open mind to acknowledge that there’s a lot more information around us than what our established five senses interprets on a daily basis.
  • Everything – All of one’s vibrations, energy, thoughts, ways of interpreting, and actions.

Why does it matter?

If I know who I am, then it gives me many clues as to why I’m here, and my purpose for living. Also, I feel it matters to my family, both past, present, and future.

Why am I writing this now?

To ease feelings associated with loneliness and loss, both for myself and others. And my hope is that the more we research and discuss our Connections, the better we can use our experiences to heal ourselves, and loved ones.

Background.

I’ve been interested in my genealogy for many years, and in particular my Native American roots since I love and am drawn to so many things said, and made by Native Americans. However, after my mom passed away (transitioned to the other side), I began experiencing stupefying co-incidences. Actually, I began experiencing incredible synchronicities even before, mama crossed over. And as an “aware” person, I began noting these occurrences and writing them down.

Before my mom passed, but after dad had called me to tell me she wasn’t doing so well, I had decided that I needed to find a piece of jewelry mom had given me years ago. In looking for the item though, I didn’t find it. Instead, I found a beautiful old watch of hers and a pocket watch, which I think had belonged to my grandfather (though I’m not sure).

I placed both items on our coffee table and felt better having these pieces near me. Call it a vibration thing, I don’t know. But I felt a bit better.

It was only a day or two until I got the call from dad that mom was unresponsive. My mind still wasn’t sure that meant she had passed though, so I’d reached out to my nurse friend to ask. I had kept busy for several hours that morning, pacing, and waiting on a confirmation from dad. I knew I wanted to get to where they were and be with dad–it was a “pull” that I’d not quite felt before. While preparing for the multi-state drive, at some point the thought came to me, “It was my time.” And bingo. That’s when it hit me. The synchronicity of the items I’d found was mom’s spirit telling me that it was her time to go, and for me to be okay with it–since she’d confirmed it by having me find not just one, but two, TIME PIECES!

She used to tell me as a teen that I was thick headed. So, I laughed out loud because I knew this was her way of reminding me of that also! That if I didn’t “get it” from finding her watch, then she’d make SURE that I understood that it was her time by having me find that second time piece! Aha! Mom was with me. I had even told someone a week or so prior that mom’s dementia sort of had her “one foot in this world, and one in the other.”

When my husband and I arrived in West Virginia, my dad was outside of the local hotel to greet us! No time was wasted! And as the Universe would have it, as we walked into the lobby of the hotel and conference center, a lone man was sitting there softly playing his guitar and singing. The song? One of mom and dad’s favorites, “Unchained Melody.” There was also, at this same time, a taxidermist convention going on–and my paternal grandfather was a taxidermist! It caused me to ponder, is mama (in the Great Beyond) hanging out with my grandparents? What a comforting and cool thought.

We spent several days with dad, but then it was time to go home. Before we could get out of the state however, my uncle would not take no for an answer that we needed to come to his home because he had something of mom’s for me. My aunt even got on the phone to tell me there was a mink coat amongst the things mom had put in their cedar closet. I couldn’t imagine my mother having a mink coat, so yes, the curiosity got the best of me and I did one of the purely selfish things I’ve ever done. I decided we’d drive a 3 to 4 hours out of our way, and go see my aunt and uncle and pick up whatever mom had packed away. My uncle also surprised us by calling my cousins and had them come to the house to visit us–something I’d never imagined would happen, but oh, how joyous that reunion was!

Finding mom’s wedding suit, and many special coats that I remembered mom wearing, along with other clothing she’d put aside, was all so very comforting for me. And as I spent weeks looking at old photos and seeing mama wearing these clothes, totally made me feel as though she was guiding my efforts. I poured through many photos in order to put together mom’s eulogy and photo slideshow.

In the weeks that followed, we would all discuss what kind of service to have for mom. My dad, so overcome with grief, would call me almost daily, and often I could hear the shakiness of his voice on the other end of the line. I tried my best to reassure him that he had more to live for, a purpose yet to fulfill.

Eventually, we’d agreed to honor my mama by having my uncle, mom’s brother, facilitate a memorial service for mom. I wasn’t going to go, but when I learned that my dad’s sister (who lives in California) would be there for her reunion during the same week, and wanted to also attend mom’s service, I began looking for a flight up. Initially, the airline I normally use, didn’t have any direct flights in. I tried to console myself that I’d just have to miss the service. But, out of the blue, the thought came to check ALL airlines, and I was able then, quite easily actually, to book a flight up with one airline into one city, and the return flight home with another airline out of a neighboring state–in the same town as one of my cousins also, whom I’d always wanted to visit with at her home!

More synchroncities.

As if, the audacity of the synchronicity of finding two of mom’s time pieces wasn’t enough, don’t you know that when I got to West Virginia for mom’s memorial service, my dad presented me with another time piece of mom’s, her favorite, “footprints in the sand” wrist watch!

Also, what really knocked my socks off, was that as soon as dad and I arrived at my uncle and aunt’s home for the service, I saw my uncle and he was wearing an indigo blue long sleeved dress shirt! If you haven’t read one of my previous posts called, “That Tiny Blue Dot” then you won’t understand the significance of this synchronicity, but the importance of it was not lost on me!

As well, the tables set up to be used for mom’s memorial service all had indigo blue plastic table cloths on them! I couldn’t have been more wrapped in love during that day, knowing mom was with me.

At  one point during the service an eagle or hawk flew directly over head! And after the service, I learned that the beautiful blooming tree (that can be seen in the videos I took of the service) is a crepe myrtle, and more than that, it had been brought back by my grandparents after a trip they’d taken years ago to Florida! I’d never known them to take a vacation in their lives, especially not all the way to Florida! I was astounded!

After the service, dad and I checked into the hotel. Quite purposely I had booked us a room at the same hotel where my dad’s sister was staying so we could visit more with her.

As it turned out though, it seemed mom had a hand in this from the other side, as while dad and I walked into the hotel restaurant area, he is looking around and tells me that he hasn’t been there in years—since he had picked up mom and one of her friends when they had imbibed and didn’t want to drive home! I was stunned! I had heard mom say she used to sell Avon at one of the hotel restaurant lounges during a particular span of time (when I had moved away and was busy raising my kids), but I had never gone there with her, and all these years later the hotel’s name had changed. Turns out we were right where we needed to be, as the friend dad mentioned, joined us for a cocktail and a beautiful conversation later that evening after my aunt left to attend a reunion function.

The morning after we’d returned home, I had awoken with a song in my head. It was an old song. Gilbert O’Sullivan’s, “Alone Again” would play over and over in my mind, and with it came the feeling that mom was giving it to me, to help me cry and release the grief.

I continue to notice and enjoy the many synchronicites that mom’s provides me. Most recently, it was meeting an artist friend who paints using a lot of indigo blue, that she herself had not realized she was using!

The importance of writing it down.

Historically, the church I was raised in kept intricately detailed genealogical records. They are publicly known for this. Because of this, and since it was always the church’s practice to offer their members something called a patriarchal blessing, mom had learned that she was from the tribe of Manasseh.

I also know, but as of yet have been unable to prove, that my mother, and her mother, carried the blood of their Native American (Cherokee) relatives. Since the Native American lineage is traced via the mother, and recorded on tribal rolls, I’ve bought many books on the Cherokee tribes and have found my grandmother’s maiden last name, but not her mother’s maiden last name. So many of the tribal rolls don’t even show a first name, or only first initials, making proving my Indian heritage nearly impossible. Please reach out to me if you have any suggestions. My great grandmother’s name was Hannah McGill Calhoun of West Virginia and her mother’s name was Louisa McDonald McGill.

Since I’d give anything to find some handwritten family history by my ancestors, I began writing, and later, blogging, so my granddaughters will have something to be able to know and understand a bit about their grandmother–me.

The importance of learning and continued growth.

You know, while writing my mother’s eulogy these words came to me, “I could burn a lot of people.”But I felt, based upon everything I’ve learned and accepted up to this point in my life, that it would be better to honor mom’s memory, life, and who she raised me to be, by choosing instead to elevate, and take the high road so to speak, because I am not angry anymore. I’m not.
For three weeks I poured through pictures of mom and my relatives. I cried. I got angry. But, I employed tools and tactics that I’ve learned over the last 10 years or so, to press on, release, and let go. By the end of the time I spent preparing my loving mother’s eulogy, I got to the point where I could just say, “Thank You.” Not just to my mother, but to many relatives and friends who, over the years, came and went, and taught us all many lessons.
I thank each of the people who have touched my life, for good or bad, for my personal growth. I believe the word “lessons” and the word “blessings” have a lot in common. And that either by the sins of commission or the sins of omission each of us can learn, if we are open to learning. Oh, we could bury ourselves in the dirt of these so called sins. But I make a conscious choice to learn from what’s happened to me. And now, I believe after we cross over in the ALL, that we then are able to see all of the intricate Connections, and come to know of the Why things had to happen in every circumstance, the way that they did.  All learning produces strength of character and more importantly, strength of spirit.
Do I still get mad sometimes? Yes.
Do I want to get revenge? Yes.
Would it change anything? No.
So, this is why I practice self-help, self-care, prayer, meditation, and other mind-body-spirit modalities. And slowly, I let go of the anger–and I get another side benefit from all of this work too, the resentments vanish.
You know, it’s ironic that mom’s remains are in her old bedroom of the house she was born in.
The place she would attempt to come back to once, and my grandmother (according to what mom told me) said, “You are welcome, but not with Sheila.” Either because she said this, or my mother interpreted her words to mean that because I was a part of my father, my grandmother did not want me to live in her house. My grandmother (at least at that time) did not like my dad, and I guess, that was the reason for her answer to my mother’s request.
These are the kinds of things I can’t seem to forget.
I believe the reason some memories nag us, is not to heap guilt (which is just another kind of thought) on us, but to remind us that we’ve missed a legacy lesson.
Mom always taught me to turn a thought about a problem, “over and over in my head” until a solution presented itself. Well, I sat with this for some time until a new thought came to me, “Let go of my hurt feelings, angst, even anger towards my granddaughter’s father. As I mentally released him from the prison I’d constructed in my mind for him, I’d break the spell (so to speak) of my grandmother’s words about me! Thus freeing my grandmother, my mom, myself, my daughter, my granddaughter, and so on! This is one small, or huge, example of the lesson I needed to learn. Perhaps I could apply it similarly in other situations?
Have I made mistakes too? You betcha.
Once, I talked with mom and dad about somehow helping them to buy them a new double-wide or other kind of trailer on their property, and they said, “No.” I replied something to the effect of, “Then, you can stay here in this place and let it fall down around you.” Ugh! My words came out the way that they did based upon the helpless feelings I felt at the time. I almost found it hard to live comfortably wherever I was living at the time, while watching my parents live in what I deemed was substandard housing. Plus, I had felt so much sadness that I couldn’t somehow free my mother from the trappings of her then painful life. But I realized later, there was nothing for me to feel guilt about since I did offer, and my offer was met with much resistance. Because I haven’t worked on freeing myself of these particular thoughts (resistance), you guessed it, my son is now going through this very same “clean up the property” experience with my dad.
You see? We each have a choice. We can accept offers of love and help, or we can choose to turn our backs and do it all ourselves.
Of course, now my mother is free. Free at last. And me? I will continue to seek solace in God and every living creature. Not in ashes. Not in trying to change the past.
While visiting Marie and my beautiful granddaughters over July 4th week, I said that perhaps mom’s strong faith, returned to her as her dementia progressed. She lived in utter gratitude daily for papa caring for her and any and all things my son, Matt, and his then wife, did for her. Total gratitude.
I believe the gratitude my mother displayed taught me to place great importance upon healing (with love and conscious awareness) those who carry her blood. All of her love beats within my spiritually open heart.
I Am Free.
Blessed be. OM

 

Got Problems? Opposites Attract

Why does it seem that opposites attract? Takers take too much from givers. Givers give too much and become drained, or sick. Energy vampires SUCK!

Dear one, oh sweet empath — they are drawn to you for your light.
For the healing energy of the light.
Just allow them to come.
Allow them to heal.
They will only take the frequencies they need.
They cannot take too much.
They cannot take your higher vibrations because they are not ready for them – they are not a match – no parity.
Keep refilling yourself from the light.
You will be gifted with higher frequencies as you see not what is seemingly being taken from you.
As they cannot take from you, that which you do not have. And you have a never ending, unceasing Limitless supply!
Why does it seem that opposites attract? Doesn’t like attract like?
The Universe conspires to order. To balance the energies.
Perhaps it is the strength of the energies that matter?
Example of alignment opposites attract.png
WARNING — You may not want to hear this! — WARNING
In everyday scenarios we explain it thusly —
The narcissist is drawn to the empath’s light. Like a moth to the flame.
Allow them to receive the light from you that no other will give to them.
THEY actually know the truth. The truth about dualism and illusion that you fail to see. It’s all about them!
But you are hurt because you do not know that it’s also all about you!
So, you stay in your hurt place, stagnant and seemingly disconnected.
That is YOUR choice.
But separation is illusion. Even if you can’t realize it yet, We Are All Connected.
Yin and Yang.
We are here to achieve balance.
This is why you, my dear and loving hearts, always attract the assholes, liars, thieves, energy vampires, wacky, crazy, bitchy, mean-spirited, which all boil down to the fact that these people are HURTING / suffering. And here they are at your door, looking to you to heal them, help them, make them whole.
Yet, you choose to turn away.
You can.
It’s okay.
But you’ll continue to get more of the same, until you clean up your vibrations.
Oh! Dear ones, you are missing a very big point.
You attract your like kind too, so that you can recharge. But is it not better to come directly to the Limitless, Ever-Living, Filling-All-Space, Creator, Source Energy — the ONE?
Hurt people aren’t of the frequency match to come to Creator.
You are their “step-up”! Perhaps you’ve heard of Jacob’s ladder?
Step up.
Step up.
Know that all of your hurt is needless. It only separates.
Know that all of your frustration is pointless. It only leads to ill health, pain, suffering.
And pain begets pain.
All you need focus on is what unifies.
All you need focus on is what uplifts.
All you need focus on is what builds.
All you need focus on is LOVE. Unconditional LOVE.
We told you this in the Be-attitudes and other ancient books.
Be still and know.
Love for ALL.
Limitless LOVE.
Love can never die. Love has always has been. And always will be.
You can transmute all disparate energies with LOVE.
Be still and know.
Omnipresence.
Omnipotence.
Omniscient.
Omni-everything.
Yes! OM I-everything.
OM
Look at how many of your common words contain the OM to bring you back hOMe: wOMan, mOM, abdOMen, accOModate, accOMplish, anatOMy, bloOM, cOMpany, cOMpass, and so on.

Example of alignment opposites attract.png

An Independent Soul on a Mission to Connect Heaven and Earth

More and more each day, I am finding the truths embedded in the ancient Chinese wisdom that Lama Nicholas Packard shared with me recently. And that our health is directly attributed to our thoughts, beliefs, and actions.

If I want to be well and healthy, I must strike a balance between my true nature (which I can feel in my body each day when I am confronted or need to make a choice about something). Yes, I can justify and rationalize, or choose to push through obstacles, but in the end, it’s how I FEEL that must be my guide. Else, I will suffer. And I do not want to suffer.

At times, I’ve been startled and taken aback by my own reactivity to people’s actions (even those whom I admire / have admired) but also to whom, I FELT a negative reaction–so much so, that I had to break away. This has happened to me before, perhaps my whole life–but I didn’t fully understand until recently.

I am such an independent person–who else would write a blog called, Take It Upon Yourself–that it’s very few people I can actually work closely with ongoing. I yearn to feel the resonance of balance.

I am an independent soul on a mission to connect Heaven and Earth by building mutually joyful and healthy relationships. Said another way, I am here as a woman of independent nature, on a mission to connect and heal people. To do this, will require balance. If I can feel negative vibrations, then easily bring them into balance–okay. But if not, depending upon the strength of the negative vibrations, I will make a different choice.

Assume for a moment that we’re birds of a feather. Both of us are interested in the same people, and read the same books, but if you believe in the concept that we “can never get it wrong”, and “there is value in everything”, yet condescend or be critical of a small action (especially for something that goes against core beliefs of mine, such as of Transparency and Sharing), that is going to resonate with me as a distinct, NO. And I will move on, leave the group, partnership, or whatnot.

Note the following example. I work on a team with someone whom I agree and align with their knowledge and experience of nutrition, vitamins, supplements and so on. Though I have learned, and would love to learn more from this person, and I respect him/her, the person can’t seem to be responsible, show up to work, put in honest effort to the project, or contribute to the team.

If I had my druthers and the autonomy to move the person to another team, I would–but I don’t. Unfortunately, if I have to work with this person, the ill feelings (that I allow the disharmony to bring), will make me sick. And I cannot give to others if I am sick. So, though it’s been three years, trust me, the end is near. I am a patient person, but enough is enough. It’s happened before with me, and it will happen again–until I connect with and to someone, or some team, where I can find balance.

This is why people leave businesses, relationships, partnerships, and so on. We all must do what feels right, or suffer. I choose what feels right to me, what feels harmonious and loving. Because if I don’t, I’m fighting my true nature. And when you work with split energies like that, it will tear you apart.

In another example, let’s take the partnership that I accept based on my ego of being needed an honored, one might think that would be a good thing, right? Well, it could easily end from my ego being offended.

Everyone has an ego, whether large or small. One with a large ego would be best served to learn how to communicate with their staff. If you’re a manager and can’t communicate properly, you should not be a manager. Period. A primary facet of Management IS communication.

Experientially learning all of this, I now realize that I will never be balanced, or feel successful in my mission to connect people, until I can find a team to work with who will allow me to bring out the best in them, for the good of the cause, and shine my eternal soul light.

Now, just what brought about all of this newfound enlightenment?

Meet Lama Nicholas Packard…
A few weeks ago, I had the profound JOY of receiving a one-on-one healing session with Lama Nicholas Packard–who has recently come to visit our conscious St Petersburg, Florida community after living in India and China for over 30 years!
I made the appointment with Lama Nicholas for holistic health career guidance, as well as some intermittent pain in the body.
I have been meditating daily since Oct. 2015, and observing my thoughts. I’ve been feeling that my current work is not in alignment with my soul’s purpose. One could also say that I’ve become disillusioned and apathetic.
I can no longer work for certain companies, and I’ve recently began expressing this fact to recruiters when they call me. I do not mince words. I do not align with companies who make, or even indirectly support companies who make products that injure people.
This stance puts me out of working for any company that creates man-made chemical products. If you are part of a company whose products harm people, do not call me. I have to draw the line in the sand.
I learned from Lama Nicholas that he believes Artificiality is killing us. And I agree. Obviously, there are natural things that can harm us also, but for us to go out of our way to develop things that harm–that’s insane.
Right from the beginning of our session, as we began talking, a little finch bird came near to me, hiding under the table next to me. Was it there to let me know it was safe to express what makes my heart sing?
Lama Nicholas first showed me my birth and life path based on a Chinese numerology system. My birthdate equals a 1, which makes me an independent type. And oh my, can I affirm this is true! Looking back over my life, I can see that as a sure pattern in me, as well as the fact that I write this blog. I don’t always need to be right, but I need to be heard!
I learned that my life path is a number 2. That means I seek Connection. And that building relationships, even so far as connecting Heaven to Earth, is my mission and purpose! Is it any wonder that I was given the message, “We Are All Connected” many years ago?
And yes, sometimes to build, one must know when to disconnect. Pruning a bush allows for more growth. So again, I am to seek balance in this quest as I move forward.
A beautifully tall, white egret walked up to us; it actually seemed to look me in the eye for a moment! The egret brought me comfort in this new experience and reminded me that I was still grounded to nature–though we were in the city, we were only a couple of blocks from the Gulf of Mexico. I also took this to mean that my meeting with Lama Nicholas would open me to even deeper knowledge of myself.
Do you sense the dichotomy though? A strong willed independent woman, who must connect with others to build relationships and usher Heaven to Earth? Wow!!!! I will need help!
The funny thing is, I’ve never been good at asking for help!
Only since my daughter gave birth to my granddaughter, have I learned along with her–to verbally ask for “a little help, please“–as it’s just not something that seems natural to me to do!
As for the Chinese animal that my birth year aligns to, I am on the cusp of the pig, and the tiger. The negative side of the pig means that I would feel a lot of fear (which I don’t), and the tiger signifies frustration. Bingo! I am very frustrated currently. Unfortunately, 30, 40, or 50 years of frustration can lead to Cancer!
Yet, the positive side of the tiger is that I am unstoppable! Yay!
Lama Nicholas told me that I am a healer. In addition:
  • I am called to a BIG mission
  • I can use the tigers’ determination + my independent spirit to bridge communities (spiritual communities perhaps?)
  • I will joyously work to connect Heaven to Earth
  • To facilitate teamwork by cooperation and balance, not to “win” as an entrepreneur
As to why I feel so much frustration at work: I need structure and am committed to working in a dynamic team–and one person on our team is arrogantly independent and adamantly refuses to work on our team, or even show up to work during core hours!
I now realize that I seek to assist others in their own healing journey as my life’s mission. And that using my hands to write, and heal others, will be key to my purpose.
After Lama Nicholas and I finished our conversation about life mission and purpose, we moved to two chairs facing each other for the physical healing part of the session to occur. I will add here though, that I really think the healing work began in and through me days before our actual meeting.
Since I had complained of an errant pain on the left side of my body, Lama Nicholas picked up and held my left leg and foot and pressed (not pinched or squeezed) but pressed with his fingers on the side of the fourth toe. I writhed in my chair with every muscle in my body tensing! It was very painful for a few seconds, but it eased quickly. I felt lightheaded and began to breathe deeply. Lama Nicholas gave me a cup of water and talked about what had happened so my mind could grasp it.
The toes are end points of meridians. And the fourth toe is the end point of the gallbladder meridian. Now, I didn’t know that I was having any gallbladder issues, but Lama did!! Note: my grandfather died of gallbladder cancer.
Next, we moved to the little toe! It hurt too, but not as bad, though my face was wincing and I was still tensing as if struggling to get away. The little toe is the end of the kidney meridian. I feel that I don’t have to explain to you what the meridians are. If you don’t know, you can Google that.
Looking back on the experience, I was surprised that I didn’t cry, cuss, scream, or such. Just tensed up and had a strong desire to pull away. To me, this also seems indicative of how I’ve reacted to other painful events in my past. A sort of quiet inward suffering, though usually with tears. I have never been a fighter or aggressive type.
One of the biggest things Lama Nicholas taught me how to do was how to bring in and cultivate Qi in the body.
Lama showed me the proper way to hold my hands together over my belly button (Dantian) while breathing deeply through the nose–holding my inhale to a count of 3 or 5 with my belly pushing outward and into my hands. Then, exhaling and pulling my belly button in towards my spine as far as I could manage and holding the exhalation to a count of 3 or 5.
Lama told me to visualize the in breath, as if it were coming into my belly, and the exhale coming out of my hands! Eventually, I made a big circle with my hands to push the Qi down on the exhale. Just this lesson alone was amazing!
Lama worked on my left arm and showed me how working the lung meridian made my tears flow–I had no idea why I began crying as he pressed points on my arm on one side, then conversely I laughed as he pressed the heart meridian points on the other side of the arm!
Feeling fantastic after the experience is an understatement. I kept saying, “Wow, Wow, Wow” after we completed the session. Amazing!
Though I am primarily an analytical thinker, you might like to know how I feel about this healing experience from my heart (or emotional intelligence).
Intuitively, I fully resonated with the information that came from Lama Nicholas and the numerology of why I was born into this lifetime, and why–up to this point–life has seemed to be a struggle.
Energetically, I felt motivated and driven to succeed in the living of my unique purpose to build new relationships, and strengthen the relationships with those already in my life. To move from the sidelines and out onto the playing field of life, to use a sports analogy.
New insights have come, such as the knowing that writing does fulfill my purpose, but so does art, working with clay, applying essential oils to people’s hands and feet, and so forth.
My mother always called me her “miracle baby” because I was the only one that lived out of six pregnancies. I believe her now because through me, all of my mom’s six babies are on the planet. Had any of my choices, or those of my daughter been any different that might not have been so. Gratefully, all things work in harmony and order in this Universe. I see that now.
This healing experience affected me mentally, by charging me up and giving me a zest for life, spiritually, by connecting me to the Divine and knowing Qi connects us all, and physically, by moving stagnant energies in my body and propelling me to learn more about Qigong, perhaps even one day teach, Qigong/Tai Chi!
I now know my purpose is to connect people and bring or connect heaven to earth. I chose a big mission, before my birth, for this lifetime and with tiger’s determination, I know I can do it.
I know that I was not born to be an entrepreneur, because of my #2 life path, which means I seek balance. I need a partner who is a #2. I know how to make money, be an excellent partner, and develop enthusiastic teams, so I am ready!
My morning and nighttime routines now include Qigong. I have been doing the deep breathing before sleep each night, just as Lama suggested. I am experiencing a dramatic shift in my thinking each day and noticing that habits are changing.
Intuitively, I took a picture of myself before the healing session, and I just took one this morning. I look much happier!
 Sheila Before and After One-on-One Healing.jpg
I know my life has dramatically been altered by meeting Lama Nicholas. I feel more energy, look and feel happier, and I am emphatically motivated to move into my life’s purpose without fear or hesitancy. And as before, I will be as water, always seeking balance–but now I understand why.
Another output from my healing session with Lama Nicholas was that I signed up to become certified at reflexology, something that a friend had suggested I try (years ago), but only now makes perfect sense to do!
Stay tuned for my next article about Qigong. You see, after taking my first two Qigong/Tai Chi classes with Grand Master Lama Nicholas, I signed up for more and believe that Qigong will become a daily practice for the rest of my life.
Be the person your Soul knows you are.
Blessings to you in ALL ways,
OM

*Consult with one of your licensed health professionals / wellness practitioner team before making any changes in your prescribed medications.