Using Emotional Freedom Technique to feel better

Originally published 2008 on my former website.

I believe any changes you are seeking to make in your life begin in your mind. That old saying, “I’ve made up my mind” has been around for a long time for a reason. Also, ever notice how many times a day you say, “I think…” in a conversation?

We are thinking every moment of our lives. Everything we feel and do starts first with our thoughts. So, I challenge you, to try to be aware of the thoughts you are thinking and see how many are limiting ones, or thoughts, that if you just “let go of” might make you feel better.

It works like this: a thought comes, then the feeling associated, then an action. Contemplate this.

This post is focused on something called Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT).

In April of 2008, I met with Janice Cunningham at HealthQuest in Titusville, Florida to see if we could stop me from a lifelong habit/addiction of picking (and/or chewing) my fingers. I previously had been a “nail biter” but an ex-husband broke me of the habit by smacking my hand anytime he caught me with it near my mouth. Yes, negative reinforcement works – to a point – but it wasn’t such a pleasant way! Meeting with Janice was the BEST $125 I EVER spent (up until that point) because aside from my body being cured of the addiction, my body also experienced other profound affects from just one EFT session!

I highly recommend Janice to everyone who is ready to work through their own “issues”.

You may be wondering what I mean when I say that I had been “picking my fingers”. So, it seemed that I only traded my bad habit of nail biting for something less noticeable. I was pulling at my cuticles, hang nails or any other rough areas of skin around my finger nails.

In 2007, I bought a book called, “Tapping the Healer Within” because my acupuncture doctor, Joan Massey (also from HealthQuest) had told me about it, and because I had tried everything else. I found that book to be a bit convoluted and besides, it mostly dealt with phobias and anxieties – neither of which I thought I had. More importantly, while reading the book, I found it too difficult to hold the book and try to tap on my body with my other hand. Or, maybe that was just my excuse – but the book, though interesting to me, wasn’t enough to help.

A few weeks prior to my personal EFT visit, my husband and I watched a show on the TLC television channel called, “I Can Make You Thin.” On the show, the host using EFT to help people overcome their food cravings. Because I had also tried everything to lose weight, I decided that I really needed some one-on-one personal guidance with both my weight issues and the finger picking habit. And much to my delight, after a 2.5 hour session with Janice, where I fully described both of my issues, I found resolution to some deep seated disturbing mental “programming.”

I had the best night’s sleep ever after that session! I guess I had not even realized that my sleep pattern had also been an issue.

So, aside from experiencing relief from finger picking that day, the habit does not reoccur unless I am stressed. I began a routine of exercising, eating less and so forth, so, the session also helped me let go of excess weight. I believe letting go of those issues aided my body in losing the weight.

During my EFT session with Janice, we spent nearly two hours going back into my past, into my former marriage, teenage years and finally, childhood years. I realized that I had picked up my habit of finger nail biting at the same time I had been diagnosed with the asthma – when I was six years of age. My mom has always been a terrible nail biter, biting her nails down into the quick (pink part), so I knew I’d picked up the habit from my mom, but I had not realized just how much of a connection there was between that habit, my asthma, and my mom.

I fully became aware, during my EFT session, that when my mom’s father died, my maternal grandfather, that this deeply affected her — and ME.

The important thing about that experience is to know now, that when I was a child, how much that event upset my mom and how fully connected I was to my mom and her EMOTIONS. It was natural for my mom to be upset about losing her father. But, I had taken her upset on as MINE. I vividly recall believing if she could lose him, I could lose her. And that I couldn’t live – couldn’t breathe in fact – without my mom.

I remembered (during my EFT session), that as a child, when I would say my nightly prayers, that I would plead with God not to take my mom away from me. This may not make sense to many people, but I am an only child, the only child who lived of the six pregnancies my mom had. My mom (and dad) have always told me how much they love me (not a bad thing in and of itself) and how precious I am, a miracle, gift, etc. But, because of this, I became a super responsible adult. I had held on to some deeply rooted beliefs about having to “live up to any and all expectations” and so forth.

My EFT session sort of felt like it had been a combination of counseling and hypnosis (though I was awake and totally aware of what was happening). It seemed as though Janice had been talking to me on a deep soul level.

During the session, Janice recommended I take some notes, both of things that I was becoming aware of, as well as how to be able to run through this process again on my own if need be.

I noted that I had always tried to “save my mom”.
I am not my thoughts.
My perception influenced my thoughts, but my perceptions were not always “true.”
The genie is out of the bottle.
I do not need the old thoughts.
Am I the thought or the awareness?
Am I “this” thought, or am I the awareness of “this” thought?
Who sent “this” thought? (My pain-body)
Examine “this” thought. It will probably be a limiting thought, a no-win thought, and one that would eventually bring pain.
To let go of “this” thought: 1) focus on the feeling of my breath in and out, 2) be the observing presence.
When I observe I suspend space.
Inspiration = In spirit, and inspiration fills me, lights me up from the inside – the same as when someone is in creative mode; you feel the creative energy inside, in your heart or chest, not in the head area.
The Aha moment when the head agrees to the inner knowing.
My nails = my own fear and anxiety to my feeling, as though I could never fix/help/save my mom.
A trigger for me is when I am faced with something I can’t do anything about, when I feel a sense of powerlessness.
But I’m a super responsible person – I’m supposed to DO something vs. just BE.
(This is the conflict that causes the habitual negative behavior).

Once we got to the root cause of my habit, it effortlessly left me.

EFT helped me to realize that even if I could pluck my mom out of her seemingly dysfunctional situation, that the change would not bring her happiness and that after all, it’s her life. It is what it is. I cannot “fix” the world. I am not here to “save” anyone else.

That “saving” realization freed me. Now, I still have other issues to work through, but wow, I really have that peace that passes all understanding after one EFT session! I have just been able to deal with things and just BE.

 

I can’t say enough about EFT. If you think you’ve tried everything to find relief from anxiety, depression, weight issues, nerve problems, etc. I implore you to try EFT. You do not need to “believe in it” for it to work for you. And what do you have to lose?

Here is a link to explain what EFT is all about: http://www.emofree.com/

You probably already know that most physical ailments begin in the mind. I’ve met many doctors over the years who have told me this too, but it is best explained: “It is an established fact that psychosomatic disorders (PSD) are in fact responsible for a great share of OTC medications, mainly for anxiety and depression. Psychotherapy deals in harmonizing the agonized mind, while Aromatherapy acts as a support system for the mind as well as the dis-eased physical body/ physiology.” per a quote from Dr. Ravi Ratan.

UPDATE: Join me for a lesson in how to perform Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) at the Awakening Wellness Center, Feb. 4th, 2017 from Noon – 1pm.

Located at:

6161 Dr Martin Luther King St N, Suite 102 St Petersburg, FL

(727) 289-4747

And come out to the Awakening Into The Sun Zen festival in beautiful downtown St. Petersburg, Florida during the weekend of March 4th and 5th at South Straub Park. I’ll be on stage between musical performances sharing about EFT.

Take it upon yourself to be healthy, joyful, vibrant, and beautiful. Be who you want to be.

–If you would like to support my blog and continue on your self help path with a trusted personal development leader, please visit my sponsor:

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Information provided is for educational purposes only and is not intended to treat, diagnose or prescribe.

What a Feeling!

I must say, today has been a ridiculously aWEsOMe day! I’ve just been published, a second time! The book launched on Amazon.com with amazing success… by this evening, yes the end of the first full day – the book “The Energy of Receiving” reached #3 in the Self-Help category, AND #1 in the Self-Help, Spiritual category!!! I, along with my publisher, and the other 16 authors (18 total) who co-created this book are THRILLED!!!

I’m reading my copy of the book and posting a review on Amazon about it SOON!

Also, my husband and I will be participating in the Awakening Into the Sun weekend festival in St. Petersburg March 7th and 8th 2015, and we’ll have a booth where I’ll be selling, and signing copies of the book. I will have 20 paperback copies for sale so, if you want a signed copy, come on out!

As an empath, it will be interesting to see how much I feel during the event, and how many times I experience “God bumps”. I continue to note, when and where I feel God bumps, and it seems that it’s whenever I am talking about God, or spiritual (deep thought) topics, become familiar with someone’s pain (mental, emotional, or physical), or open a gateway (to unlimited possibility).

UPDATE: The festival was an aWEsOMe success! We enjoyed meeting many new people, reconnecting with friends, watching and listening to new musicians, and sharing with other like-minded, like-spirited folk! I will be blogging about many of our friends in the upcoming weeks and months, so stay tuned! 🙂

You can click below to check out my latest book and buy, if you’re so inclined (and thank you). My chapter is called, “Be Open To Receive”. It’s about many lessons I’ve learned. Lessons to do with putting aside one’s judgments and making s-p-a-c-e to allow God, the Universe, the Law of Attraction, or whatever name you want to call the magical, mysterious LIMITLESS unseen force of Energy, to bring you all you’ve ever really needed, at just the right time.

Click to view the book, “The Energy of Receiving” by Happiness Publishing on Amazon.

You can also now visit my author page on Amazon –>> Click Here!

On the eve of our 10th wedding anniversary, my husband and I really have a lot to be thankful for, and celebrate.

UPDATE: Check out the press release for the book –>> Click Here!

Much love to our family and friends. With heart-felt thanks, Thank You All.

We Are All Connected.

We Are All Connected

This is an analysis of CONNECTIONS…

Big connections.

Little connections.

REAL connections.

I’ve been saying YES to many things for many years which, has brought me to this place, to write about connections. The connections we all make everyday. When you step outside your door each day, a HUGE potential exists for you to connect with someone new that offers the possibility to alter the direction of your life!

Are you OPEN to the possibilities? Are you open to making new connections?

The Merriam-Webster definition of connection is: “join two or more things“, “the state of being connected” and “a situation in which two or more things have the same cause, origins, goal, etc.” What does this remind you of? It reminds me of Jesus’ sayings:

“…if two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father who is in heaven.”

“…where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst.”

So, you need to be open don’t you? You need to be willing to be one of the two parties involved in making a connection.

When you step foot outside each day, first you connect with the ground (unless you live on a boat)! And in that case, as you step a toe in water, you cause a ripple–and I wonder what the fish and other water creatures perceive of your toe in the water?

When you put your foot on the floor upon awakening, or at the least, when you step your foot outside your door try this: say to yourself, Thank You. Try this for a week, or two. Do you find any new awareness’ opening to you?

Once you’re outside, chances are, you connect with another person. Are you grumpy? Not feeling well? Anxious because you’re running late?

spiral-energy

Time is a man-made concept. Not everyone lives by the same rules about time either. So, take a breath. Smile at the person in front of you. Be grateful you have the opportunity for this interaction, even if it’s a short interaction.

Just be grateful. Anything can happen to you today!

If there’s ever a time when you start to feel sorry for yourself, read the account of Job in the Bible.

You can live with less ego in your life when you understand that we’re all connected. Be in gratitude daily – whether something you label as GOOD or something you label as BAD happens to you. One will feel good, the other will teach you something – IF you’re open and willing to learn. See with new eyes and hear with new ears! Isn’t this an exciting time to be alive on planet Earth???

We are connected to the Earth, to the cosmos, to the air, water, plant life, and every living being and creature on the planet in one way or another. We can turn away, or we can embrace these connections. My belief is we can only become better people for embracing these connections.

American astrophysicist Neil DeGrasse Tyson has said, “We are all connected; To each other biologically. To the earth chemically. To the rest of the universe atomically.

The point is: you really can’t even walk outside without being faced with opportunities to connect with others. You can choose to make those connections good, or not so good. Your attitude and how you respond to others really does make a difference. Not just to them, but to YOU.

You can learn to become more in tune with the connections all around you.

One of my healers, Nora Ross gave me another tactic to promote peace. When someone approaches me I am to say to myself (using my inner dialog) “I love you” toward them.

What I have found is that when I can practice this the way I respond to people changes. If someone approaches me for assistance I say to them, “How may I bless you today?” or “How may I help (serve) you today?” instead of “Yes?” or “What?” then this becomes quite a profound experience and allows a magnificent exchange to occur.

For more, about how we’re all connected read the book Transform Your Life Book 2 – Inspirational Stories and Expert Insights that includes my chapter called, “We Are All Connected”. This is my first co-author book project and it’s filled with timeless insight from many gifted authors.

For more about being open, look for my second co-authored book (coming soon!) called, The Energy of Receiving” by Happiness Publishing. My chapter is called, “Open to Receive”.

I’ve been living by, and thinking in agreement with these two mantras for many years: “We Are All Connected” and “God’s timing is always perfect“. However, this is a PROCESS, there is NO COMPLETION or finish line.

 

Philosophy would also aim for us to “know thyself“. Indeed one of the most profound connections we can uncover is how our inner being is connected to God.

Some of the major connections in my life have been / are:

  • Without my mom sharing a bite of her sandwich with my dad, I would not be here
  • Without my body having experienced asthma my mom may have not taken me to a chiropractor as a child whom first taught me about natural (even holistic) health care
  • Without my maternal grandparents going to the church they did, my mother following their lead, and raising me within a Living God believing Christian faith, I would not have experienced the healing power of God via “laying on of hands” – the first and most powerful Source of Energy Medicine
  • Without my dad being in the Citizen Band (CB) business (isn’t that interesting and perfect for me? It was all about Frequency) I would not have met my first husband, father to both of my children

Are you getting a sense of the convergence that occurred already by this point in my life that’s brought me to the awareness you’re reading in my posts?

  • Without my friend Margie (also of the same Ever-Living “God still speaks today” kind of Christian faith) I would not have taken my first college class, which led to me working for a University for 10 years and obtaining my first degree in Aviation Business Administration (lots of emphasis on writing, both during my work there and their rigorous science degree program).
  • Without one mentor friend in particular, Digi , I wouldn’t have moved out of the higher ed arena to the corporate world (1997).
  • Without my friends Nancy and Holly I would not have met my wonderful “love of my life” hubby Richard! (And thank you Suzi for marrying us!) And without my friend Pattie, I might not have met her sister Nancy!
  • Without continuing my education I wouldn’t have the current financially strong and relevant career I have today (as well as, meeting beautiful coworkers/mentors along the way – many played a pivotal role).
  • Without Richard introducing me to juicing, distilled water, and a healthier way to eat (no soda or fast food since 2003) I am quite sure I would not be as healthy as I am today, and later… all those baby steps enabled me to go raw vegan, do a 40 day juice fast, etc.
  • Without Richard’s auntie Millie, (her wisdom and encouragement was so enlightening to me) I would not have tried acupuncture
  • Without listening to my own inner guidance (gut feelings) when I didn’t feel the first acupuncture doctor was right, going back and seeing Joan Massey, Doctor of Oriental Medicine for several months and asking her questions, learning, and following her advice, I would still have asthma
  • Without beginning my quest for health at HealthQuest (when Dr. Joan was there) I wouldn’t have met Dory Valentine my massage therapist and yoga teacher. I also began having colon hydrotherapy at HealthQuest (they may not offer these now) but I continued with this after moving to Orlando and found a great deal of healing from the practice.
  • Without Joan I wouldn’t have met Nora Ross (who treated me using multiple modalities including Raindrop Therapy and therapeutic essential oils)
  • Without God leading me to put my hands together when I pray and my own inner being allowing the asthma in my body to reverse and heal I would not be writing and speaking about natural and holistic health, nor would I be as healthy as I am today – able to do so much! No diseases, no aches or pains, no surgeries (as in “replacements”), and NO medications!!!
  • Without my kids, who are now grown up, I would not have a granddaughter and via marriage, a great-granddaughter who teach me much about the simplicity of being excited and thrilled all over again with all the little things of life.

I honor all of the people who have blessed me in my journey. The connections I have experienced in my life, most all have enabled me to learn and grow in some aspect.

I continue honoring all of my connections today!

Thank you to my recruiter and friend, Doreen Austin, and a referral from a previous coworker that culminated in bringing me to work in St. Petersburg, Florida–moving from Orlando, July 2013. Oh, how delicious life has become!

I would not yet be a published author without the connections afforded me by holistic life coach Dr. Alison J. Kay, (who also has a practice that assists in the clearing of our subconscious blocks). I found Dr. Kay on LinkedIn and reached out to her several times, even before moving to sort of pre-pave the way for me to work (in some / any capacity) in the holistic health and wellness arena, and continue writing on a subject that thrills me immensely on a soul level.

In Dr. Kay’s book, “What If There’s Nothing Wrong” she discusses the scientific evidences along with ancient understandings of various aspects of connection – connection of the mind to the body, “an interconnection between all animate life”, and how science is proving these connections. Dr. Kay’s book connects with what I have been studying and writing about as she states, “the mind-body connection puts the power back in the hands of the individual…” and this is the basis of my upcoming third book, “Take It Upon Yourself”.

Dr. Oz says on Oprah’s website, “…the next big frontier in medicine is energy medicine“. I believe we are at an exquisite time in history when western medicine will open to the connections to the subtle energies that guide us, working in and through us all.

Dr. Alison J. Kay introduced me to Joeel and Natalie Rivera of Transformation Magazine and Transformation Publishing while I was assisting her at the Atman Center during an event. And there, I also met Mary Ann of Awakened Fibers. I think  of Mary Ann daily when I hug my Beau pillow (read about that here). And Alania Starhawk of We Believe In Light. And by assisting Dr. Kay at the second annual Awakening Into The Sun festival (initially at First Unity of St. Petersburg), which led me to participating at the 3rd annual Awakening festival, and now, volunteering at the new Awakening Wellness center (a dream of mine) and volunteering with the 4th annual Awakening festival! How does it get any better than this? Woo-hoo!

“Sure, most physicists will tell you it’s impossible to feel this entanglement, this “spooky” connection to another living being. But when you reflect on a past love or a mother’s inexplicable knowledge of their child in danger; then you really have to stop and look at the evidence. There is proof that we are all connected, and it has more to do with the creation of the universe than the simple fact that we are all humans.”
Read more about how we are all connected here.

In my experience, if your heart is pointed in the direction of LOVE you emanate a vibration, sending ripples of unconditional love and compassion outward, which allow you to be a blessing to others. You will help yourself and lift others.

If you don’t know what to do next, follow what feels lighter (vs. heavier) and really feel for these guiding feelings IN your body before making a particular choice. Many call that listening to their “gut feeling”. I call these my “God bumps” and they are my validation that I’m heading the right way. My way, may not be your way. But, there are many paths that lead to the same destination.

Don’t ignore your inner guidance – it exists for a reason. You were fearfully and wonderfully made.

cropped-cropped-takeituponyourself-small-logo2.jpgIf you want to experience greater prosperity, health, and vitality, choose thoughts that move you in the direction that FEELS good to YOU.

If you would like to experience emotional freedom from anxiety, pain, or other negative emotion–reach out to me. I am here to help.

Please check out my books, other blog titles here and share with others.

Be a blessing – ALL ways.

Amen and Namaste.