Using Emotional Freedom Technique to feel better

Originally published 2008 on my former website.

I believe any changes you are seeking to make in your life begin in your mind. That old saying, “I’ve made up my mind” has been around for a long time for a reason. Also, ever notice how many times a day you say, “I think…” in a conversation?

We are thinking every moment of our lives. Everything we feel and do starts first with our thoughts. So, I challenge you, to try to be aware of the thoughts you are thinking and see how many are limiting ones, or thoughts, that if you just “let go of” might make you feel better.

It works like this: a thought comes, then the feeling associated, then an action. Contemplate this.

This post is focused on something called Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT).

In April of 2008, I met with Janice Cunningham at HealthQuest in Titusville, Florida to see if we could stop me from a lifelong habit/addiction of picking (and/or chewing) my fingers. I previously had been a “nail biter” but an ex-husband broke me of the habit by smacking my hand anytime he caught me with it near my mouth. Yes, negative reinforcement works – to a point – but it wasn’t such a pleasant way! Meeting with Janice was the BEST $125 I EVER spent (up until that point) because aside from my body being cured of the addiction, my body also experienced other profound affects from just one EFT session!

I highly recommend Janice to everyone who is ready to work through their own “issues”.

You may be wondering what I mean when I say that I had been “picking my fingers”. So, it seemed that I only traded my bad habit of nail biting for something less noticeable. I was pulling at my cuticles, hang nails or any other rough areas of skin around my finger nails.

In 2007, I bought a book called, “Tapping the Healer Within” because my acupuncture doctor, Joan Massey (also from HealthQuest) had told me about it, and because I had tried everything else. I found that book to be a bit convoluted and besides, it mostly dealt with phobias and anxieties – neither of which I thought I had. More importantly, while reading the book, I found it too difficult to hold the book and try to tap on my body with my other hand. Or, maybe that was just my excuse – but the book, though interesting to me, wasn’t enough to help.

A few weeks prior to my personal EFT visit, my husband and I watched a show on the TLC television channel called, “I Can Make You Thin.” On the show, the host using EFT to help people overcome their food cravings. Because I had also tried everything to lose weight, I decided that I really needed some one-on-one personal guidance with both my weight issues and the finger picking habit. And much to my delight, after a 2.5 hour session with Janice, where I fully described both of my issues, I found resolution to some deep seated disturbing mental “programming.”

I had the best night’s sleep ever after that session! I guess I had not even realized that my sleep pattern had also been an issue.

So, aside from experiencing relief from finger picking that day, the habit does not reoccur unless I am stressed. I began a routine of exercising, eating less and so forth, so, the session also helped me let go of excess weight. I believe letting go of those issues aided my body in losing the weight.

During my EFT session with Janice, we spent nearly two hours going back into my past, into my former marriage, teenage years and finally, childhood years. I realized that I had picked up my habit of finger nail biting at the same time I had been diagnosed with the asthma – when I was six years of age. My mom has always been a terrible nail biter, biting her nails down into the quick (pink part), so I knew I’d picked up the habit from my mom, but I had not realized just how much of a connection there was between that habit, my asthma, and my mom.

I fully became aware, during my EFT session, that when my mom’s father died, my maternal grandfather, that this deeply affected her — and ME.

The important thing about that experience is to know now, that when I was a child, how much that event upset my mom and how fully connected I was to my mom and her EMOTIONS. It was natural for my mom to be upset about losing her father. But, I had taken her upset on as MINE. I vividly recall believing if she could lose him, I could lose her. And that I couldn’t live – couldn’t breathe in fact – without my mom.

I remembered (during my EFT session), that as a child, when I would say my nightly prayers, that I would plead with God not to take my mom away from me. This may not make sense to many people, but I am an only child, the only child who lived of the six pregnancies my mom had. My mom (and dad) have always told me how much they love me (not a bad thing in and of itself) and how precious I am, a miracle, gift, etc. But, because of this, I became a super responsible adult. I had held on to some deeply rooted beliefs about having to “live up to any and all expectations” and so forth.

My EFT session sort of felt like it had been a combination of counseling and hypnosis (though I was awake and totally aware of what was happening). It seemed as though Janice had been talking to me on a deep soul level.

During the session, Janice recommended I take some notes, both of things that I was becoming aware of, as well as how to be able to run through this process again on my own if need be.

I noted that I had always tried to “save my mom”.
I am not my thoughts.
My perception influenced my thoughts, but my perceptions were not always “true.”
The genie is out of the bottle.
I do not need the old thoughts.
Am I the thought or the awareness?
Am I “this” thought, or am I the awareness of “this” thought?
Who sent “this” thought? (My pain-body)
Examine “this” thought. It will probably be a limiting thought, a no-win thought, and one that would eventually bring pain.
To let go of “this” thought: 1) focus on the feeling of my breath in and out, 2) be the observing presence.
When I observe I suspend space.
Inspiration = In spirit, and inspiration fills me, lights me up from the inside – the same as when someone is in creative mode; you feel the creative energy inside, in your heart or chest, not in the head area.
The Aha moment when the head agrees to the inner knowing.
My nails = my own fear and anxiety to my feeling, as though I could never fix/help/save my mom.
A trigger for me is when I am faced with something I can’t do anything about, when I feel a sense of powerlessness.
But I’m a super responsible person – I’m supposed to DO something vs. just BE.
(This is the conflict that causes the habitual negative behavior).

Once we got to the root cause of my habit, it effortlessly left me.

EFT helped me to realize that even if I could pluck my mom out of her seemingly dysfunctional situation, that the change would not bring her happiness and that after all, it’s her life. It is what it is. I cannot “fix” the world. I am not here to “save” anyone else.

That “saving” realization freed me. Now, I still have other issues to work through, but wow, I really have that peace that passes all understanding after one EFT session! I have just been able to deal with things and just BE.

 

I can’t say enough about EFT. If you think you’ve tried everything to find relief from anxiety, depression, weight issues, nerve problems, etc. I implore you to try EFT. You do not need to “believe in it” for it to work for you. And what do you have to lose?

Here is a link to explain what EFT is all about: http://www.emofree.com/

You probably already know that most physical ailments begin in the mind. I’ve met many doctors over the years who have told me this too, but it is best explained: “It is an established fact that psychosomatic disorders (PSD) are in fact responsible for a great share of OTC medications, mainly for anxiety and depression. Psychotherapy deals in harmonizing the agonized mind, while Aromatherapy acts as a support system for the mind as well as the dis-eased physical body/ physiology.” per a quote from Dr. Ravi Ratan.

UPDATE: Join me for a lesson in how to perform Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) at the Awakening Wellness Center, Feb. 4th, 2017 from Noon – 1pm.

Located at:

6161 Dr Martin Luther King St N, Suite 102 St Petersburg, FL

(727) 289-4747

And come out to the Awakening Into The Sun Zen festival in beautiful downtown St. Petersburg, Florida during the weekend of March 4th and 5th at South Straub Park. I’ll be on stage between musical performances sharing about EFT.

Take it upon yourself to be healthy, joyful, vibrant, and beautiful. Be who you want to be.

–If you would like to support my blog and continue on your self help path with a trusted personal development leader, please visit my sponsor:

Get Ready! Your breakthrough awaits at TonyRobbins.com.

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Information provided is for educational purposes only and is not intended to treat, diagnose or prescribe.

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Playing the “blame game” – climbing the emotional guidance ladder to a better feeling place

Playing the blame (guilt) game, ugh! But, I am where I am (as Abraham says) so, it’s gotta be okay. I am where I am in the middle of dis-ease, or grief, or shame, or self-loathing, or x-y-z, but, I am where I am and it’s okay. Why is it okay? Because I am where I am and I’ve got no other choice. Except to consciously take steps to improve my feelings, and reach a better feeling place. I want to feel better. I know it’s possible, but in “this moment”, my “now”, I am where I am!
I thought it might help me (and maybe others reading this who unfortunately fall into grief and despair), if I write down a couple of ways I worked through my pain over putting my beloved (almost 14 year old) best furry friend, Lou-Lou’s Beau “down”. (By the way, why the hell do they call it “putting him/her down” anyway? I think it should be “released” because my intention was to release him from his pain! Ugh! Beau 2009 summer
I also do EFT tapping using these statements which, helps to calm me and provide emotional relief. So here we go. Abraham (from the book, “Ask and It Is Given” state there are 22 groups of emotions one can be in, in any point in time. #22 is the lowest vibration, the bottom of the list. The lowest of the lows. So that’s where I start. Not to wallow, but you gotta start somewhere and that’s where I was the day I let Beau “go”.
The intention of “Ask and It Is Given” is to help us locate where we are, what state we’re in emotionally, at any given point, and move UP to a better feeling place on the list. The following are my words, using their numbering scale. I am not plagiarizing – but if you follow their list, you’ll see where I’m getting the terms from. Also, this is going to take awhile, so you may want to check back in a week or so to see how I’m doing, as my intention is to climb the emotional guidance ladder to a better feeling place.
22) I can find all kinds of reasons to feel guilty at this point (and I am talking “to” Beau at this point):
  • I could have researched more about your eye problem;
  • I could have had your eye removed; Beau closeup
  • I could have changed my mind, at any point, during the last year and a half regarding, “no more surgery” on you, after you had the kidney / bladder stone surgery.
  •  Stupid insensitive me held a belief, for some reason, that you shouldn’t have any more surgeries. Why?!? That was a limiting belief! Ugh!
  •  I was so afraid you couldn’t take another surgery. You’re older, you aren’t strong enough (Who the hell am I to judge that?)
  •  I’ve bought other things this year that I could have spent that money on you instead. You were much more important to me!!
  •  I could have spent every waking moment with you, instead of going shopping, or going to a class, or working! (Okay, really?)
  •  I miss you so much! I hurt because you are not here! I miss holding you, caring for your eyes, taking you to the groomer, feeding you, and walking with you!Beau 2008
  •  You were powerless and I feel horrible that you tried to tell me what to do but I didn’t listen, didn’t realize when you face planted off the couch that you were trying to pop your own eye out to relieve your pain and heal your body! Ugh?
  •  I am in despair that I now have learned that I could have asked one of your previous veterinarian’s to remove your eye! Actually none suggested that to me or we would have done that with the first eye then maybe the second eye would never had gone bad!!
  •  What is the point of living this life when everything / everyone dies eventually?!? This is depressing!
  • My mom loved you (and Lou-Lou) so much too! She didn’t get to say good-bye to you! Waaaaa!!My mom snuggles Beau 2008
21) I am feeling so unworthy of all the trust you placed in me to care for you.
  • Unworthy of your unconditional love!!! Gasp!
  • I feel such guilt for not doing ALL I could have for you!
  • My ignorance should be no excuse!!
20) I am jealous that the neighbor’s dog is probably older than you, but he’s still around!
  • He seems to be doing fine.
  • Oh, but he’s a mixed breed.
  • I never get jealous… but I am in this moment!
  • Others around us, they seem to be able to “go on living” without any thought about what we’re going through! The nerve! (I know, emotions are not logical!)
19) I feel anger at myself for not doing more! But, how much more could I “really” do?
  • Anger at the doctors, especially that opthamologist we saw a year a a half ago for not offering the eye removal option!!
  • They just wanted me to keep bringing you back to them every three months for a refill script / recheck for a compounded eye drop that you’d supposedly need every day of your life (mail order available only from NJ!!). Such bullshit!! Beau 2009 hanging out
19) I am discouraged that other people and doggies have to go through this trauma too!!
  • What discourages me is the inevitability of it all!
  • Why live this life if it’s all so futile?
  • Look how adorable both you (and Lou-Lou) were back in the day (2008) with my mom! My mom with Beau and Lou-Lou 2008
18) I don’t feel revenge – yet.
Wait, perhaps I do! I think I understand the revenge thing now. I feel that for myself. So, anger turned outward is revenge or spite. But, anger turned INWARD is depression, guilt, or self-loathing.
17) I am angry at myself for not being more bold on your behalf! But, I know you couldn’t live in your physical body forever. Ugh! This anger really feels strong in my body. I think yes, anger turned inward, to myself, causes depression, sadness, and pain.
16) I am discouraged.
  • I am disheartened that you suffered needlessly for months, (Gasp!) God forbid, more than a year!!
  • I am utterly discouraged with some of the veterinarian’s we went to over the years.
  • What about the guy who told me you just had “old doggy eye”. Jesus! Was he for real?
  • Then the next doctor, who I really liked, when I told him what the previous doctor had said, did not disagree with him, but did suggest more medications for you. And that I should take you to an opthamologist, which I did.
  • I am discouraged for others, that they’ll have to find a way, and figure this stuff out – even while their doggies (or cats) suffer needlessly. Why can’t we just “know” it all? Why can’t we go to one person, Google it, or read a book to find out?
  • Why all of this time seemingly wasted on the “trying” to figure it out?
15) I blame myself for your pain.
  • I will never trust myself to ever have another pet.
  • I am horrible! Besides, I could never replace YOU!
  • You were my best boy and best doggy EVER. Period!
  • This is the worst ever feeling!
  • I am so sorry Beau!!!
  • I trusted professionals to help (oh, maybe now I feel vengeful?) the experts should have given us the option a year ago to have your eye removed! Beau after Critter Oil bath3
14) I am worried if I did the right thing in “releasing” you.
  • My adult children (thank you sweet ones) have comforted me, saying I did, but I have all of these questions racing through my mind. Angst!
  • I almost never worry, but I am holding my worry finger (as I learned in Jin Shin Jyutsu) so I must be worried.
  • I feel the need to harmonize my worry over your suffering.
  • You almost never showed discomfort! But that didn’t mean you didn’t feel discomfort! Oh Beau! My best boy! Beau front Aug 2014
13) Doubt. Didn’t what I just say, show how much doubt I am in? Doubt and worry seem so tightly joined!
  • I doubt that I did the right thing (releasing you from your physical body), and then I doubt that I waited too long to do it!
  • I can’t make up my mind at all when I am in doubt.
  • I am mentally running to and fro!
  • This is sickening!
  • I cannot allow myself to stay in doubt for too long. I will make my stomach upset. I will make myself crazy… okay I might already be on “that train”. Hmmm
  • I doubt that I’ll get “your” ashes back, and what would I do with them anyway?
  • I doubt that your physical remains will comfort me. I took a lock of your fur – that comforts me a little.
  • I doubt I’m going to feel any better today. Beau and Lou-Lou Easter haircuts 2009
12) I am so ridiculously disappointed in myself.
I should have known better, and not stopped researching until I totally resolved your eye issues.
Why? Because I recall a dog trainer I had taken Lou-Lou to for several weeks, years ago told me, “The dog is this tall, but you are this tall! You can see things and make the choice to avoid them!” Truer words have never been spoken. Even if you are five feet tall, you are taller than your dog and can navigate them through life.
11) I am overwhelmed by sadness.
  • I seem to cry at the drop of a hat.
  • I look at your picture on my desk at work, and I cry.
  • I start to talk about you to someone, and I cry.
  • But I am starting to see that sometimes, I don’t cry.
  • And that makes me know that I am definitely reaching, trying to find, a better feeling place – even if just for a few seconds or minutes in between thoughts of you.
  • Thoughts of missing you so very much.
  • I was overwhelmed with responsibilities and did not place you in a higher priority of concern.
  • I am overwhelmed by the love and support of my family and friends during this time (though I do not feel deserving of it).
10) I am frustrated and irritated with the way I handled, or failed to appropriately handle my grief. Okay though, that’s one reason I am working through the emotions via this blog.
Oh, a few people attempted to encourage me out of my sadness, but yes, that just irritated me more!
9) I guess I am being quite pessimistic right now, never wanting another pet. Sheila and Beau Bike Week Daytona 2010
8) I sense boredom is around the corner for me.
But wait, I’ve got a ton of pictures of you that I can share. And I found where I had made a Daily Puppy page for you years ago — HERE.
And, the author of a book I am editing offered me her sincere words of compassion when she emailed me:
“Your beautiful and precious dog will be by your side forever more.” Thank you my dear, Lela Starseed.
7) Will I ever feel content again? You used to make me feel content when you would lay on the couch with me! Beau fav place Aug2014
6) Will I ever feel hopeful again? I hope you are running, jumping, and playing in your Spirit ethereal body that is whole and new!!
  • On the day of your release, our new vet told me that you’d meet Lou-Lou again at the Rainbow Bridge (and we laughed for a moment, that you may not want to!) then I said, “Beau, look for your tall white dog friend!”
  •  A couple days later, I’m calling in my family who passed, to find you.
  • I remember when I was a child, other kids would say, “don’t have a pity party”, during times when I displayed sadness. I also know self pity can be self destructive. How can we balance all of these feelings, when Recovery groups tell us we must allow ourselves to “feel our feelings”?
  • I know I need to move out of, rise above, the feelings of sadness about Beau.
  •  I am hopeful that as, We Are All Connected, you have reconnected with my family who loved you too! Oh… this is how I can reach for hopeful feelings! This is hope!Beau 2008 so handsome
 5) Everything I have learned about ‘life after death’ tells me, ANYTHING is possible!
  • I can feel optimism for you when I visualize you with a big white dog!
  • Was it an English Setter that you fell so in love with?
  • I have been researching this, and asking others, because I am still trying to pull myself, consciously, up this list (to feel better)! 
    Beau back Aug 2014
4) I am attempting to reach for thoughts of positive expectation, to believe you live on – somewhere.
  • While visualizing you crossing over the Rainbow Bridge, I see you dancing for a big white dog!
  • Perhaps, you’re even frolicking!?!
  • I focus on the fact that you’re no longer suffering.
  • I know you’re out of pain. Beau 42613
3) Oh, how in the world can I be happy? How can I feel enthusiasm / eagerness again – about anything?
  • I know that “life goes on”. I don’t like it, so now, I’m back to #9.
  • I know the emotional guidance system is not linear. I will go up and down this ladder many times over – for as long as it takes.
  • I know you’re out of pain. Beau Christmas 2008
2) I know passion is out there. In my future.
  • I remember the passion I had when you first came into my life. How small you were!
  • I remember sweetly, what it felt like to nurture, train, feed, bathe, and care for you. Beau 2003
1) I know joy is out there. In my future, I will remember how much joy you brought me. Those memories will have to sustain me, because you’re no longer here! Sniff!!! Tear. I miss you so very much! But somehow, I will smile again when I think of you. Someday, I will smile and not get a tear in my eye. da beauster
  • Because I will ALWAYS appreciate having had you in my life.
  • Because I know how to empower myself, to reach for better feeling thoughts, via multiple emotional healing modalities – yes, even at the lowest of times.
  • Because I know you’re FREE! You’re experiencing FREEDOM. Oh, sweet ultimate freedom!
  • I am grateful, so beautifully grateful, to have experienced your love, and to have loved you!
  • Beau came to show me that Lou-Lou loved me unconditionally too, but in a different way. She just expressed unconditional love differently than him! Beau and Lou-Lou in the coach Dec 2010
  • Remembering the wonderful way my beautiful granddaughter would say, “Awe!” When I would lift Beau to the camera to say hello to her when we would Google Hangout or Skype. She would say that with such a compassionate voice, just like she knew how he was feeling, or just because as a child, she loves furry creatures. I don’t know, but it warms my heart to recall how she said it.
  • Talking with a friend and relating a memory about a time when we were walking and someone yelled at me to get Beau away from their grass, I looked up at the sky and exclaimed, “thank you Beau! I will never have to go through that again!”
  • All of this knowledge, it is helping me to feel better. And I am open to receive more knowledge.

UPDATE 25-Oct-2015: Just when I had begun, and I do mean “begun” to feel I’d worked through all of my feelings (figured out how to get all the way to number one on the emotional guidance scale… I slid right back down to #15 (at least) and started crying when my beautiful little four year old granddaughter asked to “see Beau” while we were on video conference tonight! Damn, where was my emotional balance that had begun to feel better? It all went to shit, and fast. I had to jump right back on here and read my list again!!

UPDATE 27-Oct-2015: My wonderfully supportive husband put a big picture of you (Beau) on our iMac desktop. When I sat down at the computer and touched it, lighting up the desktop to reveal your picture, I gasped, “Oh, Beau!” and then, “Oh, thank you hubby! What beautiful thing to do!” It was this close-up of Beau taken about six or seven years ago. He was in perfect health! But, I started to cry…

UPDATE 28-Oct-2015: I don’t know what happened. But, when I came home from work today (after having my Pilates workout), I signed onto the computer, saw Beau’s close-up picture and I smiled! Yes, finally! It’s been a week now after his passing and I can actually smile and think of GOOD memories when I see his picture. This is wonderful progress back to my normal emotionally balanced set point. We went to dinner also, and I was able to show the picture I took of the computer desktop, 1) to give my husband props for doing this, and 2) to show off Beau. He’s such a cutie. I was able to talk about him and not cry. I still miss him, and yes, I catch some emotion in my throat when I go to plug my phone in, near where his water bowl was, but I am letting go of the overwhelming emotions.

A week later I still cry when I look at his picture (not every time, but often). So, why? Because I miss him!
I still feel guilt about not doing more sooner to alleviate his infection / illness. (even guilt about perhaps I should have put him down sooner!)
I could allow myself to feel guilty about EVERYTHING to do with his ill health but, in reality, I know I tried. As my kids and I have discussed many times, we can only do the best we can about anything at any given time based on the information we understand at the time.
I must give myself a break.
UPDATE 1-Nov-2015: I updated this post with pictures of Beau. After meditating yesterday, doing a journeying process at Alania’s studio, I am, just this morning, able to go through all of the pictures and videos I have of Beau (and Lou-Lou) and find special ones to share — without crying. I am finally, now, at a point where I have some emotional balance about everything that happened. All of the good, the utter joy of having Beau in my life, and the not-so-good stressful times… during his ills.
I wrote a eulogy for Beau, a little at a time, during the ‘decision’ time. I shared it on Facebook then, but not here — until now. This is the link to it — HERE.
UPDATE 7-Nov-2015: My dad and mom have a mixed breed who had puppies three months ago. When we visited, my dad really wanted me to have one of the three puppies. I just couldn’t do it. Too many reasons. One, it was just too soon. And two, I still don’t know if I ever want another. But, I know it might be the last gift my parents are able to give me. Ugh! And yes, the puppies are oh, so cute! There is a black, brown, and reddish colored one – she’s the smallest. Adorable! Almost a Yorkie. Then a snow white one, a bit bigger. She’s also a girl. What a princess. All of their personalities are similar to Beau’s. Quite docile. Then a beige or light golden boy. He is the largest of the three, just a bit smaller than his mom and all three are three months old. How much bigger will they get? My son put an ad on Craig’s list. We sat there all afternoon meeting with would be “parents”. One young man took Princess home, bathed her, only to return her awhile later. His girlfriend did not agree in their having a second dog. But awhile later, she was adopted by another young couple. We were glad to be able to meet and visit with each adopting couple, so we knew they were going to good homes. The next morning, after I left, my son let me know the third, the golden boy, was also adopted by an older married couple. Ah! Because when I had left he was giving me those “eyes” like,
Why aren’t you taking me?” — that broke my heart.
At any rate, that day, I talked with my dad and he said the mommy, Sunday, was still crying and looking for her puppies. Had they waited too long to let the puppies go?
UPDATE 10-Nov-2015: Dad called me and was still upset about all the puppies being gone and said Sunday is still crying for them. I am at a loss except that I think perhaps I should send Sunday a nice stuffed animal to have. I also researched and found that when we (the people) are still upset, the dogs will pick up on our feelings and display similar emotions.
UPDATE 11-Nov-2015: I Google Hangout with my granddaughter and show her my two stuffed doggies that my husband bought me years ago, that resemble our Beau (and Lou-Lou). She seemed really happy that I had them, and she accepted my short story about Beau crossing the Rainbow bridge and being healthy and happy now. And that he had left us these “replicas” of them for us to remember them by. I still have my moments when I cry. But, I know that in the big scheme of things, that’s okay.
So, yes this has all definitely been a process. The goal was to be able to reach for any of the thoughts higher than #11 I guess, in order to be in a so-so kind of minimum good feeling place about Beau not being here anymore. Obviously, being at #1 or #2 all the time (about his not being here in the physical realm) was something, at that time, I never thought could happen. But, some of those thoughts, along with most of the thoughts being in the good feeling range, eventually helped me overcome the feeling of wanting to burst into tears when anyone asked about him, or when I would see another Shih-Tzu that looks like him, etc.
I have talked with others who have told me they still cry, years later, about the loss of their pet. And as an empath, I feel very deeply. I knew if I could figure out a way, or at least, “allow” myself the space to exist where I could attempt to feel better, it would help me, emotionally. Holding onto hurt, loss, guilt, grief, and all of those painful feelings can cause dis-ease in the body (which, I want to avoid if possible).

I hope others can benefit (at least a little bit) from my process. Love and many blessings to all (furry and human).

We Are All Connected

This is an analysis of CONNECTIONS…

Big connections.

Little connections.

REAL connections.

I’ve been saying YES to many things for many years which, has brought me to this place, to write about connections. The connections we all make everyday. When you step outside your door each day, a HUGE potential exists for you to connect with someone new that offers the possibility to alter the direction of your life!

Are you OPEN to the possibilities? Are you open to making new connections?

The Merriam-Webster definition of connection is: “join two or more things“, “the state of being connected” and “a situation in which two or more things have the same cause, origins, goal, etc.” What does this remind you of? It reminds me of Jesus’ sayings:

“…if two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father who is in heaven.”

“…where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst.”

So, you need to be open don’t you? You need to be willing to be one of the two parties involved in making a connection.

When you step foot outside each day, first you connect with the ground (unless you live on a boat)! And in that case, as you step a toe in water, you cause a ripple–and I wonder what the fish and other water creatures perceive of your toe in the water?

When you put your foot on the floor upon awakening, or at the least, when you step your foot outside your door try this: say to yourself, Thank You. Try this for a week, or two. Do you find any new awareness’ opening to you?

Once you’re outside, chances are, you connect with another person. Are you grumpy? Not feeling well? Anxious because you’re running late?

spiral-energy

Time is a man-made concept. Not everyone lives by the same rules about time either. So, take a breath. Smile at the person in front of you. Be grateful you have the opportunity for this interaction, even if it’s a short interaction.

Just be grateful. Anything can happen to you today!

If there’s ever a time when you start to feel sorry for yourself, read the account of Job in the Bible.

You can live with less ego in your life when you understand that we’re all connected. Be in gratitude daily – whether something you label as GOOD or something you label as BAD happens to you. One will feel good, the other will teach you something – IF you’re open and willing to learn. See with new eyes and hear with new ears! Isn’t this an exciting time to be alive on planet Earth???

We are connected to the Earth, to the cosmos, to the air, water, plant life, and every living being and creature on the planet in one way or another. We can turn away, or we can embrace these connections. My belief is we can only become better people for embracing these connections.

American astrophysicist Neil DeGrasse Tyson has said, “We are all connected; To each other biologically. To the earth chemically. To the rest of the universe atomically.

The point is: you really can’t even walk outside without being faced with opportunities to connect with others. You can choose to make those connections good, or not so good. Your attitude and how you respond to others really does make a difference. Not just to them, but to YOU.

You can learn to become more in tune with the connections all around you.

One of my healers, Nora Ross gave me another tactic to promote peace. When someone approaches me I am to say to myself (using my inner dialog) “I love you” toward them.

What I have found is that when I can practice this the way I respond to people changes. If someone approaches me for assistance I say to them, “How may I bless you today?” or “How may I help (serve) you today?” instead of “Yes?” or “What?” then this becomes quite a profound experience and allows a magnificent exchange to occur.

For more, about how we’re all connected read the book Transform Your Life Book 2 – Inspirational Stories and Expert Insights that includes my chapter called, “We Are All Connected”. This is my first co-author book project and it’s filled with timeless insight from many gifted authors.

For more about being open, look for my second co-authored book (coming soon!) called, The Energy of Receiving” by Happiness Publishing. My chapter is called, “Open to Receive”.

I’ve been living by, and thinking in agreement with these two mantras for many years: “We Are All Connected” and “God’s timing is always perfect“. However, this is a PROCESS, there is NO COMPLETION or finish line.

 

Philosophy would also aim for us to “know thyself“. Indeed one of the most profound connections we can uncover is how our inner being is connected to God.

Some of the major connections in my life have been / are:

  • Without my mom sharing a bite of her sandwich with my dad, I would not be here
  • Without my body having experienced asthma my mom may have not taken me to a chiropractor as a child whom first taught me about natural (even holistic) health care
  • Without my maternal grandparents going to the church they did, my mother following their lead, and raising me within a Living God believing Christian faith, I would not have experienced the healing power of God via “laying on of hands” – the first and most powerful Source of Energy Medicine
  • Without my dad being in the Citizen Band (CB) business (isn’t that interesting and perfect for me? It was all about Frequency) I would not have met my first husband, father to both of my children

Are you getting a sense of the convergence that occurred already by this point in my life that’s brought me to the awareness you’re reading in my posts?

  • Without my friend Margie (also of the same Ever-Living “God still speaks today” kind of Christian faith) I would not have taken my first college class, which led to me working for a University for 10 years and obtaining my first degree in Aviation Business Administration (lots of emphasis on writing, both during my work there and their rigorous science degree program).
  • Without one mentor friend in particular, Digi , I wouldn’t have moved out of the higher ed arena to the corporate world (1997).
  • Without my friends Nancy and Holly I would not have met my wonderful “love of my life” hubby Richard! (And thank you Suzi for marrying us!) And without my friend Pattie, I might not have met her sister Nancy!
  • Without continuing my education I wouldn’t have the current financially strong and relevant career I have today (as well as, meeting beautiful coworkers/mentors along the way – many played a pivotal role).
  • Without Richard introducing me to juicing, distilled water, and a healthier way to eat (no soda or fast food since 2003) I am quite sure I would not be as healthy as I am today, and later… all those baby steps enabled me to go raw vegan, do a 40 day juice fast, etc.
  • Without Richard’s auntie Millie, (her wisdom and encouragement was so enlightening to me) I would not have tried acupuncture
  • Without listening to my own inner guidance (gut feelings) when I didn’t feel the first acupuncture doctor was right, going back and seeing Joan Massey, Doctor of Oriental Medicine for several months and asking her questions, learning, and following her advice, I would still have asthma
  • Without beginning my quest for health at HealthQuest (when Dr. Joan was there) I wouldn’t have met Dory Valentine my massage therapist and yoga teacher. I also began having colon hydrotherapy at HealthQuest (they may not offer these now) but I continued with this after moving to Orlando and found a great deal of healing from the practice.
  • Without Joan I wouldn’t have met Nora Ross (who treated me using multiple modalities including Raindrop Therapy and therapeutic essential oils)
  • Without God leading me to put my hands together when I pray and my own inner being allowing the asthma in my body to reverse and heal I would not be writing and speaking about natural and holistic health, nor would I be as healthy as I am today – able to do so much! No diseases, no aches or pains, no surgeries (as in “replacements”), and NO medications!!!
  • Without my kids, who are now grown up, I would not have a granddaughter and via marriage, a great-granddaughter who teach me much about the simplicity of being excited and thrilled all over again with all the little things of life.

I honor all of the people who have blessed me in my journey. The connections I have experienced in my life, most all have enabled me to learn and grow in some aspect.

I continue honoring all of my connections today!

Thank you to my recruiter and friend, Doreen Austin, and a referral from a previous coworker that culminated in bringing me to work in St. Petersburg, Florida–moving from Orlando, July 2013. Oh, how delicious life has become!

I would not yet be a published author without the connections afforded me by holistic life coach Dr. Alison J. Kay, (who also has a practice that assists in the clearing of our subconscious blocks). I found Dr. Kay on LinkedIn and reached out to her several times, even before moving to sort of pre-pave the way for me to work (in some / any capacity) in the holistic health and wellness arena, and continue writing on a subject that thrills me immensely on a soul level.

In Dr. Kay’s book, “What If There’s Nothing Wrong” she discusses the scientific evidences along with ancient understandings of various aspects of connection – connection of the mind to the body, “an interconnection between all animate life”, and how science is proving these connections. Dr. Kay’s book connects with what I have been studying and writing about as she states, “the mind-body connection puts the power back in the hands of the individual…” and this is the basis of my upcoming third book, “Take It Upon Yourself”.

Dr. Oz says on Oprah’s website, “…the next big frontier in medicine is energy medicine“. I believe we are at an exquisite time in history when western medicine will open to the connections to the subtle energies that guide us, working in and through us all.

Dr. Alison J. Kay introduced me to Joeel and Natalie Rivera of Transformation Magazine and Transformation Publishing while I was assisting her at the Atman Center during an event. And there, I also met Mary Ann of Awakened Fibers. I think  of Mary Ann daily when I hug my Beau pillow (read about that here). And Alania Starhawk of We Believe In Light. And by assisting Dr. Kay at the second annual Awakening Into The Sun festival (initially at First Unity of St. Petersburg), which led me to participating at the 3rd annual Awakening festival, and now, volunteering at the new Awakening Wellness center (a dream of mine) and volunteering with the 4th annual Awakening festival! How does it get any better than this? Woo-hoo!

“Sure, most physicists will tell you it’s impossible to feel this entanglement, this “spooky” connection to another living being. But when you reflect on a past love or a mother’s inexplicable knowledge of their child in danger; then you really have to stop and look at the evidence. There is proof that we are all connected, and it has more to do with the creation of the universe than the simple fact that we are all humans.”
Read more about how we are all connected here.

In my experience, if your heart is pointed in the direction of LOVE you emanate a vibration, sending ripples of unconditional love and compassion outward, which allow you to be a blessing to others. You will help yourself and lift others.

If you don’t know what to do next, follow what feels lighter (vs. heavier) and really feel for these guiding feelings IN your body before making a particular choice. Many call that listening to their “gut feeling”. I call these my “God bumps” and they are my validation that I’m heading the right way. My way, may not be your way. But, there are many paths that lead to the same destination.

Don’t ignore your inner guidance – it exists for a reason. You were fearfully and wonderfully made.

cropped-cropped-takeituponyourself-small-logo2.jpgIf you want to experience greater prosperity, health, and vitality, choose thoughts that move you in the direction that FEELS good to YOU.

If you would like to experience emotional freedom from anxiety, pain, or other negative emotion–reach out to me. I am here to help.

Please check out my books, other blog titles here and share with others.

Be a blessing – ALL ways.

Amen and Namaste.