Walking more than a mile in another’s moccasins

My grandmother (of Cherokee Native American Indian descent) often said,

Never judge someone until you’ve walked a mile in their moccasins.

And apparently, as a child, those words soaked into me and became my mantra. And I became an empath. Or perhaps, I was born an empath and her words resonated with me and validated my nature. Either way, in my experience, being empathic has been like living on both edges of a sword. 

I’ve realized my life’s path has had me walk more than a mile in my mom’s moccasins–and also in my dad’s shoes. And I’m tired. Yet, profoundly grateful I’ve had such a multitude of experiences to learn so much.

No matter how many times I’ve pondered the heartache, the gut-wrenching, soul-shaking, events of my childhood–that I’ve recreated (knowingly or not) in my adult life, with some incredibly outlandish desire to FIX–I eventually cane to a knowing that I can’t fix anyone else. And I’m glad I figured that out before I met my third husband! 

No one can fix anyone else.

Just like that old joke, 

How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? None. The light bulb has to want to be changed.

Unfortunately, even my children picked up the yoke of this dastardly twisted need to fix others, as they’ve fallen into some of the same relationship woes as I. And fortunately, all of us are in healthy relationships presently! Thank Limitless God we’ve all awakened from the lure of this whole “fixing” trap!

So, why am I writing this piercing note in the middle of the night?

Because I promised my daughter, if I accomplish one thing on this planet while I’m alive this time around, it is to break the “lather, rinse, and repeat” cycle of fixing–for my granddaughters. And all of my writing (both online and in books) is to ultimately leave earth-bound knowledge for my grandchildren. Of course, if any of these words help others, that’s icing on the proverbial cake! 

You see, I never knew Divine LOVE, until I held my first granddaughter in my arms. She (Jennifer Ann), means more to me than I could describe.

What can I deduce from this new found comprehension of having walked all of these miles, in my mother’s, and yes, some in my father’s moccasins?

That life’s not been easy. But, it was never my job to work out their issues.

My “love of my life” husband and I picked up a saying this past year that goes,

Not my circus, not my monkeys.

And whenever I start to complain about something that doesn’t really belong to me–someone else’s drama–my hubby will pop that quote out to me. I love him so much for bringing things like that to my attention! He knows the empath in me often gets sucked into other’s drama, because I always feel that I can help ease their pain–somehow.

The Universe presented us with that very same phrase while we were enjoying our big outdoor annual Awakening Into The Sun festival! My friend Mary Ann, owner of Awakened Fibers had a handmade wall hanging with the words, “Not my circus, not my monkeys” embroidered on it! How fun!

And as if that wasn’t enough, a few minutes later while visiting with Dr. Alison J. Kay, her assistant, Brenda, told us a new phrase that fully resonated with me. It was, 

You’ve heard it said to get your ducks in a row? But, they were never your ducks.

My goodness! What if the stuff I had taken on (for years), all of those “other people’s problems”, were never my ducks? I never needed to get any “ducks” in a row to straighten out my parents issues. Who did I think I was to feel burdened to do that? Ugh! And now you see why I am tired. Tired of carrying the emotional baggage of others–it was never my stuff to carry!

On the upside, I’ve had a successful (nearly thirty year) career (out of the need to walk in my dad’s technical “know-how” shoes). And after wanting a pair of real honest-to-God moccasins for years, I finally got some, and I’ve been wearing them everyday.

Wearing moccasins daily, I feel every pebble under my feet as I walk. And I love that! I’m constantly mindful that each challenge in life is as the grain of sand that produces a pearl in an oyster!

My daily walks provide me with the benefit of grounding daily, and the knowing that the wearing of these moccasins, physically brings my grandmother’s saying directly into my body—making her words experiential—instead of it just hanging around in my head like some mystical cloud.

So, yes, there are always positives. I know this. Why does it have to take some of us so long to figure things out?

Oh, because we’re programmed as children. Culturally, socially, and if you were raised in a religious faith, you (and I) were programmed. I’m glad I figured that out!

Now, energetically at least, I’ve cut the cord of all of this for my granddaughters. 

Here and now I state, my grandchildren will not have to take any historical family burdens upon themselves. They can be self-filled. Self-motivated. They can help others as they choose. Free spirits! They can care for themselves first, without guilt. They can choose to do what they love! They do not have to repeat the sins of their parents, or of mine. They do not need to try and figure anything out. The past is the past and it is abSOULutely done.

I have broken this chain of fools.

 

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What happened after attending “Your Sensitivity Is Your Power” teleseries

Just before the New Year, I had the immense pleasure of doing a bit of “pre-paving” my future by attending Dr. Alison J. Kay’s, “Your Sensitivity Is Your Power” tele-call series, and wowee!!

So, what happened after I attended the tele-call series?

I gained a clarity of my own personal power. Almost like I was stepping up a staircase of emotional well-being and balance! Yes, I accepted an invitation from the Universe to step up my personal power by being on these calls, and I’m the better for it!

As a sensitive type of person–in my life having been known as one to cry easily, become overly concerned with other people’s dramas, or get easily overwhelmed, I noticed each day after the tele-call experience, I felt lighter, happier, and less concerned with other people’s “stuff” going on around me!

Sometimes, I tend to feel as though I am carrying the burden of other people so much, that I prefer not to interact with others at all. Much of those feelings lifted after the tele-call series for me, and continue to lift as time goes on.

People used to tell me they knew I was naturally empathic. Dr. Kay explained empaths and their traits in great detail during the tele-call series. She let us know how each of us could use our gift of empathy to give us more ease and comfort day-to-day. We learned how to use our sensitive side without losing our sense of self.

After each tele-call, I began to practice any/all of the following each day–whenever any difficult situation or conversation would occur:

  • Mentally ask myself,Is this mine?” And, if I knew it was NOT my problem, then I would mentally state, “Return to sender with grace, ease, and love attached, or I would simply state, “Send ’em love” (learned previously, but not practiced much) to really feel the vibrations emanating from my heart (the invisible intelligence Dr. Wayne Dyer used to speak of) going out to the person, lifting my feelings about whatever was going on.
  • Breathereally breathe, even take an extra walk as needed, climb stairs, stretch, or meditate. Then at my office desk, self soothe with my Young Living essential oils, Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), Jin Shin Jyutsu (JSJ), and/or Yamuna Body Rolling — using one ball behind my back and/or putting my bare feet on the foot wakers under my desk. (This has also has enabled me to share these modalities with others when they would ask what I was doing–Yay!)
  • Distance myself when my inner being tells me, re-soundly, that right NOW (in THIS moment), this person or place is not good for me (or I am not good for others in this space). I honor, respect, and love myself enough, to walk away and go to another place where I can feel good!
  • Set boundaries. I can choose whether–whatever is happing in this moment–conflicts with what I’ve previously written about (to “Be open to receive”) and to know that I am allowed also, to receive or not. Must I receive all and filter? Must I receive bad to receive good? Maybe. But, I have the power to choose that for myself.
  • Expand my energy – Each morning include in my meditation to go into my awareness and expand it outward to my family, my circle of influence, neighbors, local community, state, region, country, continent, and world. Celebrate the knowing of others via Twitter, Facebook, my blogs, etc. whom live in other countries. Celebrate this knowing of WE ARE ALL CONNECTED. This is true.
  • Empower myself. Indeed, put my cape on! 😉 Be my authentic self. Act on the truth that my inner being resonates with, i.e. when I feel my “God bumps”. I even signed up for Dr. Michael Bernard Beckwith’s Life Visioning class, no doubt because of how powerful I felt after completing Dr. Kay’s tele-call series! How does it get any better than this? Yay! And later, I signed up for Yamuna classes (see this Examiner article I wrote) to learn about “Body Rolling”.
  • Though I know, I don’t act like it. It is never necessary to be the victim. I am not trapped. I always have a choice. I break any DNA, biological, mental, or spiritual chains that could have come through my lineage and blood. In the name of our Limitless, Ever-Living, Omniscient, Omnipresent, Omnipotent, Pulsating, Be-ing, Creator Source God who IS the Energy that holds the Universe together. Beyond what we can see. Beyond what we now know. Faith IS the substance of things not yet seen.

Empaths have our own level of sensitivity, level of awareness, unique energetic healing modalities, and spiritual gifts to share with the world! I am ready to share mine!

The tele-call sessions with Dr. Alison J Kay and her empowering messages and clearings, transformed past (even something that happened a moment ago is “the past”) shame of negative actions–allowing me to consciously “let go” of negative limiting thoughts, acknowledging that forgiveness is a daily process. I knew the pain I felt in my body were the cells of my body (scientist Candace Pert proved cells hold memories) calling out for me to transcend and know that really everything IS okay!

Dr. Kay’s clearings tuned me in and provided me with different verbiage to explain to myself, and to you in this post, what had been happening. Healing is an ongoing PROCESS!

Everyday life causes certain connections to occur:

  • The neighbor who may or may not smile at me when I step outside. That person doesn’t know me.
  • The store clerk that serves me may ask, “Did you find everything okay?” without really meaning it.
  • The restaurant owner’s son, who while ignoring us, scolded an employee (the employee was actually attempting to seat us) for not following proper procedures. He didn’t realize they would lose a customer by behaving that way in front of us, instead of just seating us–they could train their staff in private later!
  • The soldier (police, firefighter, teacher, or other public servant) who is just “doing their job” without considering the moral choices he or she actually has.

Many of us abdicate our ability to choose and lose a moment (or more) of happiness and joy for  ourselves and others. And we can help others – we really can! If we’re in better shape emotionally, mentally, and physically, we can change the world! And why is that important? Because We Are All Connected!

The energies and what I learned during Dr. Alison J. Kay’s tele-call series for sensitives continues to free me. The time spent on her calls FELT sooo good, not just for a short time, but weeks later.

About Dr. Alison J. Kay: Meditation and yoga teacher Dr. Alison J. Kay, offers weekly group telephone calls, online video-conferencing (Google Hangout), and private sessions where you can learn about meditation techniques. She teaches yoga classes too! Her group fitness classes include: yoga, mind-body, and core-strengthening.

Dr. Alison J. Kay studied in the east, Asia and India and thoroughly knows and understands the basis of the placebo effect (using several modalities, including meditation) and it’s relationship basis of subtle energy.

Learn more about Dr. Kay here –>> Alison J. Kay (Healer, author, yoga and meditation teacher, QiGong instructor, and coach)

The tele-call  series gave me hope for all of us to continue on our journey, learning and growing every day. To me, there is no such thing as “false hope”. Hope is hope. Because FAITH is the SUBSTANCE of things not yet seen.

I invite you to continue opening your mind to learning about something new in 2016 and beyond. You are never to old to be open to receive new and helpful information.

Be ye blessed in ALL ways.

 

What a Feeling!

I must say, today has been a ridiculously aWEsOMe day! I’ve just been published, a second time! The book launched on Amazon.com with amazing success… by this evening, yes the end of the first full day – the book “The Energy of Receiving” reached #3 in the Self-Help category, AND #1 in the Self-Help, Spiritual category!!! I, along with my publisher, and the other 16 authors (18 total) who co-created this book are THRILLED!!!

I’m reading my copy of the book and posting a review on Amazon about it SOON!

Also, my husband and I will be participating in the Awakening Into the Sun weekend festival in St. Petersburg March 7th and 8th 2015, and we’ll have a booth where I’ll be selling, and signing copies of the book. I will have 20 paperback copies for sale so, if you want a signed copy, come on out!

As an empath, it will be interesting to see how much I feel during the event, and how many times I experience “God bumps”. I continue to note, when and where I feel God bumps, and it seems that it’s whenever I am talking about God, or spiritual (deep thought) topics, become familiar with someone’s pain (mental, emotional, or physical), or open a gateway (to unlimited possibility).

UPDATE: The festival was an aWEsOMe success! We enjoyed meeting many new people, reconnecting with friends, watching and listening to new musicians, and sharing with other like-minded, like-spirited folk! I will be blogging about many of our friends in the upcoming weeks and months, so stay tuned! 🙂

You can click below to check out my latest book and buy, if you’re so inclined (and thank you). My chapter is called, “Be Open To Receive”. It’s about many lessons I’ve learned. Lessons to do with putting aside one’s judgments and making s-p-a-c-e to allow God, the Universe, the Law of Attraction, or whatever name you want to call the magical, mysterious LIMITLESS unseen force of Energy, to bring you all you’ve ever really needed, at just the right time.

Click to view the book, “The Energy of Receiving” by Happiness Publishing on Amazon.

You can also now visit my author page on Amazon –>> Click Here!

On the eve of our 10th wedding anniversary, my husband and I really have a lot to be thankful for, and celebrate.

UPDATE: Check out the press release for the book –>> Click Here!

Much love to our family and friends. With heart-felt thanks, Thank You All.

We Are All Connected.

Take only what you need, leave the rest

I’ve gone to many churches (different religions) over the years and I have found some common thinking among them. I love learning about God and all means of connecting with our Creator. I don’t search because I haven’t found God, I search because there’s so many different ways to connect with God!

But there were some preachers who said things I didn’t like (meaning that I found some of the things they said were divisive and did not resonate as positive with me). Things such as:

  • “We’re right, they’re wrong”
  • “We are the only church preaching the true gospel”
  • “We’re the only ones baptizing the correct way”
  • “All other religions are wrong

Those statements seemed contrary to my nature and what God put upon my heart and some were contradictory to what Jesus said (or have been attributed to Jesus) in the Bible.

When I asked some of the followers of these kinds of churches about the things their preacher was saying they replied: “Well, I may not believe everything the church, religion, or my preacher teaches but I follow the basic tenets and leave the rest”.

Then I asked, why would you continue to attend (or belong) to a church / faith that did not align with your beliefs? Most would answer something along the lines of:

  • “I stay out of respect for my spouse, parents, grandparents, etc.”
  • “The preacher is smarter, more studied, etc. than me”
  • “I’ve gone to this church my whole life and changing now would be too difficult”
  • “Perhaps I’m being convicted and have more to learn here”

Then I came upon the statement of: “Take what you need and leave the rest” when I attended several different 12 step recovery programs during a time when an ex-spouse was dealing with substance abuse and his doctor wanted the whole family to undergo therapy.

The concept reminded me of what those church goers told me years before so I began applying that concept to many things in life. Truly in all of my research and study I have not found anyone who “knows it all” so that phrase has helped me open to more. I have not found anyone who has a perfect life, or “has it all” no matter how you define the words, perfect and all.

I’ve written before about my maternal grandparents raising my mother and her siblings in a particular faith that believed in the Almighty Living God. One of the most challenging aspects of that Christian faith is how many other people, even other Christians, called our church a cult! But I would not have experienced the healing power of God via “laying on of hands” – the first and most powerful Source of Energy Medicine – had I not been attending that particular church. In fact, I was healed of colitis when I was young because my mom knew to call upon the elders.

To explain a bit about that experience, when I was about seven or eight years of age I experienced severe abdominal pain, cramping, bloating, and difficulty eliminating (all symptoms of colitis). My mother took me to the hospital emergency room. During the doctor’s physical examination of me I became hysterical because of one particular method the doctor used which scared me to death and physically hurt!

I think my shrieks and cries of pain reminded my mother that our family typically prayed first and asked for laying on of hands by the elders (totally calming and non-invasive), before going to a doctor or hospital. So, she took me home and called the elders of the church to come and administer laying on of hands to me. I never experienced any symptoms of colitis after their prayer!

NOTE: The doctor had prescribed some paregoric Kaopectate that a pharmacist had to compound for me, along with an enema when we got home. The interesting thing to me now about his recommendation of the enema is that had we believed in having colonics / colon hydrotherapy or enemas on a regular basis and right ways of eating I never would have been in that situation to begin with!

I should also mention at this point that I recognize in some emergency instances intensive allopathic medical options may be necessary. I do not mean for anyone to throw the baby out with the bathwater so to speak and throw all allopathic medicine to the curb. All healing comes from God and God allows doctors, nurses, and healers (including allopathic practitioners) to possess abilities and skills to help people. However, in my experience, prayer is most powerful and now the Mind, Body, and Spirit sciences are proving this!

I have had friends and family who prayed and went to the doctor. I am not judging that. God works in all ways, often mysterious! God can heal you on the way to the doctor! The important distinction is: Ask God first! Ask and continue asking. Then be open to receive God’s answer.

Do not judge or condemn others who believe differently than you, as they have their own path. If you believe God lives in you, they may also believe God lives within them! When you argue with them about their beliefs the vibration of that interaction actually runs counter to what God wants which, is for all peoples to live in peace acknowledging Creator God.

If you want to open to receive more, the Bible teaches:

“Study to show yourself approved to God…”

“Be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind…”

As for the church of my youth, while I feel it beautifully served me well for a time, I am continuing to seek wisdom by following the pulsing sensation (“God bumps”) I feel in my body when God, our Source, our Creator confirms I am on the path. I’ve learned that judgment does not resonate with me. Oneness speaks to me.

Now my “church” occurs anytime I talk with at least one other person about our LIMITLESS Ever-Living Filling-All-Space Creator. And I continue to research and study. I find much of the new science thrilling! To me it all validates God it does not negate God. Darwinian evolution theory is out – disproven. Science still does not know where we came from but chromosome 2 in our DNA proves we did not evolve from ape-man. Kids, your school books are WRONG.

Currently, I am reconnecting with things that interested me as a child. Because I used to love archeology and dinosaurs I began listening to Gregg Braden. One of his recent interviews about his book Deep Truth – (click on the words Deep Truth to watch his video on YouTube) or  watch the interview I saw on GaiamTV.

Gregg’s interview led me to explore this site, about heart-based coherence: Global Coherence

I follow and study the work and writing of many people though. To me, this is a topic I will be able to study the rest of my life. There’s soooo very much to learn!

In all things I wish you love, peace, and many blessings. In fact, everything you have and all that is around you right now (even any suffering you may be experiencing) is with you for a reason and to bless you.

Take only what you need, leave the rest. Thank you and Namaste.

Reality is ONLY what we perceive

This is a comparison of two thoughts –

Crazy people don’t know they’re crazy.

AND

What IS a lie?

I’m an analyst by nature. But I am also creative! I taught myself how to draw anime and paint. I like to make sense of things. I am a seeker. Always attempting to understand.

Because I’m an analyst, I keep my eyes and ears open when others (though I was trained at an early age to “tune people out”) are spewing crap and I try to figure out what prompts them to do so. What are the intentions behind their actions? Do they INTEND to hurt people?

Why?

Let’s look at the LARGER expanded context. The way I perceive a statement (which might be true for you) may not ring true for me?

The Merriam-Webster definition of a lie is: “To make an untrue statement with intent to deceive” and “to create a false or misleading impression”.

Ah, then a lie really is your perception of reality that differs from my perception of reality. Agreement is never found within a lie. A lie separates people.

It’s the reason I always say there are multiple sides to every story. But wait! Do not use my words against me. You can’t purposely hurt someone, lie about it, and then say I am the one who’s not hearing YOUR side. You can’t do that. It doesn’t work that way. Because? Crazy people don’t know they’re crazy.

Just because we know there are multiple facets to each person, each event, each statement in life, does not give you license to hurt people.

Jesus Christ was quoted as saying, “you shall know a tree by its fruit”. To determine if you are on your right path, look at the fruits of your current activities. (References: Matthew 7:16, Matthew 7:17, Matthew 7:20, Matthew 12:33, Luke 6:43, Luke 6:44, and John 15:4)

I am sure if you take a good long look at yourself in a mirror, looking deeply into your OWN eyes – then sitting quietly in prayer and meditation seeking to know if you have hurt anyone, then you may glimpse if you are the healer, OR if you are the PROBLEM.

No one is perfect, and that is a healing statement. Forgiveness is HUGE, and I do forgive those who have purposely hurt me (or my family or friends) because I know we’re all spirit experiencing being human.

There are troublemakers and there are peacemakers. If you look at the fruit of your life, you’ll know which you are.

I am a peacemaker. You know this by looking at the fruits of my life.

When others use us, lie, cause trouble for us – the peacemakers all to often carry that crap around, thinking we caused it somehow. But, I am finding that peacemakers did not cause it – those problems are not ours. It’s negative energy and unhealthy. Don’t carry around any problem that is not yours.

I’ve been living by, and thinking in agreement with these two mantras for many years:

“Everything happens for a reason.”

and

“I wouldn’t be the person I am today, without all of the experiences I’ve had (thus far) in my life”.

However, this is a PROCESS, there is NO COMPLETION or finish line.

So, because this is a process, I am always seeking ways to “let go” of the past, even if the past was yesterday, because my perception of reality is that people can be hurtful. People lie, gossip, cut me off in traffic, etc. which is why I love energy medicine!

Energy medicine is so helpful, on many levels. It allows the cells of our body to let go of negative experiences, so they do not get STUCK in the body and manifest into dis-ease.

That said, recently I experienced an aMaZiNg healing energy medicine session with Dr. Alison J Kay!! We really broke through some very old sh*t (past trauma / guilt of a negative situation) and I was empowered to let go of some very deep emotions that consciously I had thought I had done all my forgiveness work on (years ago) but apparently the cells of my body (scientist Candace Pert proved cells hold memories) had NOT! Dr. Kay cleared my heart chakra in this session and WOW! Haha! Healing is such a PROCESS!

It FELT sooo good to get that heaviness out of my heart! It was really like we did a heart chakra colonic! Why did I ever think that hurtful person’s actions were mine?

I accept FULL responsibility for what I allow to happen in my life. I know there’s VALUE in everything, though some experiences FEEL better than others. And sometimes, it takes years to be able to find the value of certain people or experiences we’ve known.

Since we cannot control everything in our lives, it’s good to realize and focus on this: What I give out, returns to me – like the ripples from a pebble thrown into a pond. That is why it is so much better to focus on what feels good (pointed in LOVE) than what feels bad (pointed in FEAR).

  • Do not make trouble for people.
  • Mind your own business
  • Do not gossip.
  • Go back and read the Ten Commandments (those weren’t just “suggestions”). If you’re not into the Bible, look at the results of your actions.

When you throw a pebble in the water, the ripples extend and touch much more than you know. But know this, the ripples return to their source. What you dish out, will return to you – it is a universal LAW. So, “send them love”. In any situation or circumstance – just send them LOVE.

If your heart is pointed in the direction of LOVE, you will be a blessing to others, not a curse. Watch the movie Maleficent– it’s something to think about.

If you’ve read this far, perhaps you’re a healer and peacemaker also. Thank you.

If you want one more way to know whether you’re motivated by love or fear – ask yourself the following questions on any particular issue you’re facing:

  • Is there any value in my association with this (person, place, or thing)?
  • Is this (person, place, or thing) really necessary in my life?
  • How does it feel to me when I think of this (person, place, or thing)?

Once you’ve answered these questions for yourself, you’ll know what to do. Follow what feels lighter (vs. heavier). Always, in all ways, go forward, move ahead – doing what FEELS GOOD!cropped-cropped-takeituponyourself-small-logo2.jpg

You can suffer if you want to. But, if you want to experience greater health, go in the direction that FEELS good to YOU.

In the name of our Limitless, Ever-Living, Omniscient, Omnipresent, Omnipotent, Pulsating, Be-ing, Creator Source God who IS the Energy that holds the Universe together. Beyond what we can see. Beyond what we now know. Faith IS the substance of things not yet seen.

In ALL ways, BE a blessing.

Namaste.